Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-11-06

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The graph displays the data about ratio of individuls living in four asian countries who lived in cities for eight decades.

Overall, Malaysia recorded the highest attendence in terms of individuals living in cities. Whereas, Thailand registered the least attendees of people living in cities.

remaining Phillipines and Indonesia were also among the list with people living in cities and registered as the normal numbers.

Malysia started with 30% individuals in 1970 , jumped to 40% in the next decade and surged throughtout the period until in reach

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.5

The response identifies Malaysia as having the highest urban share overall and Thailand as the lowest at the start, so it shows some awareness of the graph’s main comparisons. However, the overview is incomplete: Thailand does not remain the lowest throughout, as the Philippines is lower than Thailand in 2010 and 2020. The account gives only a few figures and stops mid-sentence at “until in reach,” leaving the later trends and forecasts unreported. It also describes the Philippines and Indonesia only as having “normal numbers,” which does not communicate their contrasting rises. The response contains 88 words, below the required 150, and therefore cannot provide a sufficiently developed summary. Select the key changes and comparisons, then support them with accurate figures.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

There is a basic attempt to organise the response: an opening sentence is followed by an overall statement and then a detail about Malaysia. The use of “Overall” helps signal a summary, and “Whereas” attempts to contrast countries. However, the progression is difficult to follow because the overview is split into several short, loosely connected statements, and the final sentence is unfinished. “remaining Phillipines and Indonesia…” does not clearly connect to the preceding comparison, while the shift from overview to Malaysia lacks a clear paragraph structure. Use a concise introduction, a complete overview, and separate detail paragraphs grouped by trends. Linking comparisons directly—for example, contrasting Malaysia’s strong rise with the slower growth in Thailand—would make the sequence clearer.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The response attempts some task-related vocabulary, including “recorded,” “registered,” “jumped,” and “surged,” and uses percentage figures to describe change. However, several choices are inaccurate or unnatural for a line graph: “attendence” and “attendees” refer to attendance at an event, not the proportion of a population living in cities, and “normal numbers” is too vague to describe a trend. Spelling errors such as “individuls,” “asian,” “Phillipines,” and “Malysia” are noticeable. The range is also limited, with repeated references to “individuals” and “people.” Build a more precise set of terms such as “urban population,” “proportion,” “share,” “rose,” and “declined,” and check country names and spelling.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response uses mostly simple sentence patterns, with an attempt at a more complex construction in “Malysia started with 30% individuals in 1970, jumped to 40% in the next decade and surged…” The sentence is incomplete, however, ending with “until in reach,” and the opening phrase “ratio of individuls living…” lacks a clear grammatical structure. “Whereas, Thailand registered…” is presented as a sentence fragment rather than being joined to a main clause. There are also problems with articles and sentence punctuation, including the space before the comma in “1970 ,” and the lowercase start of “remaining.” Aim for complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, and vary simple comparisons with correctly formed clauses.

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