Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-11-06

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The graph illustrates the data about percentage of urbanisation in four asian countries (Malysia, Thailand, Phillipines and Indonesia) for five decades, with predictions for 2030 and 2040.

Overall, Although every country registered people with urban population with Malaysia suscessfully recorded as the top of the tier with most significant numbers and Thailand with the lowest figures. Additionally, Phillipines and Indonesia also registered urban residence but the figures were low.

Malaysia and Phillipines 1970 they registered 30% figures of urban residents and both jupmed foe the next two decades reaching over 48% and 46% respectively. afterthat, Malaysia had dramatical growth reached to

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.5

You identify the topic and include an overview that recognises Malaysia as the leading country and Thailand as the lowest in the broad comparison. However, the overview is unclear and partly inaccurate: Thailand is not consistently the lowest, since Indonesia starts below it and later overtakes it. The report gives only a small portion of the data, and the final sentence stops at “reached to,” leaving the main trends and forecast period largely unreported. The comparison that Malaysia and the Philippines both stood at 30% in 1970 is also incorrect; the Philippines was about 32%. The response is 101 words, below the required 150, which further limits coverage. To improve, complete the report and select key changes across all four countries.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

There is a basic attempt to organise the response into an introduction, an overview and a detail paragraph, and the opening gives the reader a clear sense of the chart’s subject. However, progression is weak because the overview is difficult to interpret and the final paragraph ends mid-sentence, so the account does not develop through the time periods. Linking is also limited: “Additionally” is used, but relationships between the countries and changes over time are not clearly signposted. The phrase “Malaysia and Phillipines 1970 they registered…” makes the comparison hard to follow. Use complete paragraphs with a clear sequence—overview first, then grouped country trends—and connect comparisons explicitly with phrases such as “whereas” or “by contrast.”

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some task-relevant vocabulary, including “urbanisation,” “predictions,” “growth” and “figures,” and the general topic remains understandable. There are also attempts at more descriptive language, such as “dramatic growth” and “top of the tier,” but several choices are inaccurate or unnatural, which limits precision. “Registered people with urban population” and “registered urban residence” do not express the intended data clearly, while “top of the tier” is not a natural way to describe the highest proportion. Spelling errors such as “Malysia,” “Phillipines,” “suscessfully” and “jupmed” are noticeable. Build a reliable set of chart-reporting collocations and check country names and spelling carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response attempts both a complex opening sentence and an overview beginning with “Although,” showing some willingness to vary sentence forms. However, control is inconsistent, and several sentence structures are incomplete or difficult to follow. “Overall, Although every country registered…” combines a sentence opener with a subordinate clause but does not form a clear, complete statement. “Malaysia and Phillipines 1970 they registered…” lacks a clear grammatical structure, and the final clause, “Malaysia had dramatical growth reached to,” is unfinished. There are also problems with articles, word order and punctuation, including the capitalisation of “Although” after a comma and the run-on sequence in the last paragraph. Practise complete subject–verb sentences and use subordinate clauses only when the main clause is also complete.

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