Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-11-10

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

THAILAND and phillippines population in cities increased a bit recent years in these countries population growth increased abit everyyear in cities.in the future also it is predicted that the poplution in cities will be increased in a moderate rate in cities.

the percentage of polution living in indonesia and espacially in malaysia have increased dramatically.the percentage of population living in cities in indonesia have increased dramatically in 2020.in malaysia the percentage of population living in cities have increased at a very rapid rate

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You identify the four countries and make a relevant broad comparison: Malaysia and Indonesia rose, while Thailand and the Philippines changed less. However, the response only minimally reports the graph. It gives no clear overview of the countries’ relative levels or the main changes across the full period, and the claim that Thailand and the Philippines increased “every year” is inaccurate: the Philippines fell between 1990 and 2010. The reference to Indonesia increasing “in 2020” is also unclear, rather than describing its substantial rise over time. The response is 67 words below the required minimum, which leaves the key features and comparisons substantially underdeveloped. Include an overview and support it with accurate figures or time-period comparisons.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

There is a basic attempt to group the information: the first paragraph mentions Thailand and the Philippines, and the second turns to Indonesia and Malaysia. This gives the reader some sense of the intended comparison. However, the ideas do not develop in a clear sequence, and the response lacks an opening overview and a concluding summary of the main patterns. Repetition, such as saying that city populations “increased” several times, also limits progression. The connection between the countries and the time periods is often unclear, particularly in “increased dramatically in 2020.” Organise the report around an overview followed by comparisons of the trends, and use time references to make each point easy to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The response uses a small set of relevant terms, including “percentage,” “population,” “cities,” and “increased dramatically,” so the general subject can be understood. However, vocabulary is repetitive and sometimes imprecise: “increased a bit,” “moderate rate,” and “increased dramatically” are repeated or used without specifying the trend or period. There are also noticeable spelling errors, including “phillippines,” “poplution,” “polution,” and “espacially,” which reduce accuracy and polish. Build a wider range of trend language, such as “rose steadily,” “climbed sharply,” “remained relatively stable,” and “declined,” and check spelling and word forms before submitting.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You communicate several basic ideas using simple sentence patterns, but the range of structures is very limited and errors occur frequently. For example, “the percentage of population living in cities in Indonesia have increased” has a subject–verb agreement error; “the percentage” requires “has.” The opening sentence also has an unclear construction: “in these countries population growth increased abit everyyear in cities.” Sentence boundaries and punctuation are inconsistent, with missing spaces after full stops and long, loosely connected clauses. Practise writing complete sentences with a clear subject, verb, and time reference, and check agreement and punctuation. More accurate simple sentences would make the trends easier to understand before you attempt more complex comparisons.

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