Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-11-13

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

Starting from 1970 Philippines, Malaysia, Thailand and indonesia, Peple starting moving to cities significantly. Lest break it down one by one.

Starting from Indonesia:

in early 1970 to 1980 only 10 percent of its propulation were living in cities but after 1980 to 1990 this number significantly rose. after 1990 more then 20 percent of its population starting living in cities. the predication is that more then 60 percent of its population will move to cities by 2040.

Now lets discuss about Thailand

in early 1970 to 1980 only 20 percent of its propulation were living in cities but after 1980 to 1990 this number this number didnt change at a higher speed compare to other countries, In 30 years from 1990 to 2020 only 30 percent of kts popluation moved towards the cities amd in foreceable future it is predicted that by 2040 only 40 Percamt kf its population will move towards the city.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

The response identifies an overall rise in urbanisation and gives some relevant details for Indonesia and Thailand, including the prediction that Indonesia will exceed 60% by 2040. However, it addresses the graph only partially: the Philippines and Malaysia are not discussed, and there is no clear overview comparing all four countries or identifying Malaysia as the highest by the end. Several figures and time spans are also inaccurate. For example, Indonesia was already at about 25% in 1990, rather than only moving above 20% after that point, while Thailand rises from roughly 33% in 2020 to about 50% in 2040, not 40%. Select the main trends across every series and report comparisons accurately to develop a fuller summary.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response has a basic sequence, moving from an opening statement to separate sections on Indonesia and Thailand. Phrases such as “Starting from Indonesia” and “Now lets discuss about Thailand” help signal the topic change. However, the organisation is incomplete and does not guide the reader through the graph as a whole: two countries are omitted, and there is no concluding overview or comparison. The repeated “Starting from” structure and the long, loosely connected sentences make progression feel mechanical. Use a clear overview followed by grouped comparisons—for example, countries with the highest urban shares and those with lower shares—and connect figures with concise linking phrases.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The vocabulary is sufficient to communicate the general subject, with relevant terms such as “population,” “cities,” “rose,” and “predicted.” There is some attempt to describe change, but the range is limited and several choices are inaccurate or awkward, including “moving to cities” for a percentage already living in cities and “moved towards the cities.” Spelling errors such as “propulation,” “predication,” and “foreceable” are noticeable and can distract the reader. Aim for precise graph language and consistent collocations, such as “the proportion living in urban areas increased” or “is projected to reach.” This would make the description clearer and more appropriate to an academic report.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response attempts some longer sentences, including clauses linked with “but” and time expressions, but the range is limited and these structures are often faulty. For example, “after 1980 to 1990 this number significantly rose” has an unclear time construction, while “this number this number didnt change” contains repetition and missing punctuation. There are also problems with articles, agreement, and sentence boundaries, as in “only 10 percent of its population were living” and the run-on sentence beginning “in 30 years from 1990 to 2020.” These errors sometimes make relationships between dates and figures difficult to follow. Practise accurate past-tense descriptions and use shorter, well-punctuated sentences alongside more controlled complex forms.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.