Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-07-26

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The graph illustrates about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040.

Overall, there were many ups and downs in philippines. In malaysia there was steady increased. In thailand percentage of total population remained stable.

To begin with, in philippines there were many ups and downs till 2020 in 1970 there was 30% of total population by the 1990 it was rised and came to 50% until 2040 it is predicted that there will be more than 50% of total population. In thailand there was also rised in total population but it remained stable.

Moreover, in malaysia there was sharp increased in 1970 there was 30% of total population by the 2024 it is predicted that it will be reached at 80% of total population. In indonesia there was also up side trend in 1970 it was less than 20% but by the 2040 it is predicted that it will be reached at 60% of total populaton.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses the task by identifying the main features, such as the trends in the four countries. However, the analysis is superficial and lacks precision. For instance, the description of the Philippines as having 'many ups and downs' is vague and does not accurately reflect the data trends. Furthermore, the report fails to make meaningful comparisons between the countries, which is a key requirement for Task 1. The data points cited are sometimes inaccurate or poorly integrated, and the overall summary lacks a clear synthesis of the information provided in the graph.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is mechanical and sometimes repetitive (e.g., 'In thailand', 'In malaysia', 'In indonesia'). There is a lack of logical progression between sentences, and the referencing is occasionally unclear. The transition between the introduction and the body paragraphs is abrupt. While there is an attempt to group information, the flow of ideas is hindered by the limited range of linking words and the repetitive sentence structure, which makes the text feel disjointed.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is limited and repetitive, relying heavily on basic phrases like 'total population' and 'there was'. There are noticeable errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'up side trend' instead of 'upward trend' and 'rised' (a grammatical error affecting lexical accuracy). The range of vocabulary is insufficient to convey the data with precision or variety. To improve, you should incorporate more sophisticated terminology related to trends and data reporting, such as 'fluctuated', 'gradual increase', or 'projected to reach'.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The response relies on simple sentence structures, and there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Common issues include incorrect verb forms (e.g., 'it was rised' instead of 'it rose'), missing articles, and punctuation errors. There is a lack of complex sentence structures, and the control over basic grammar is inconsistent. For example, 'The graph illustrates about' is an incorrect collocation. The frequent errors in tense and word formation suggest a limited command of English grammar, which prevents the response from reaching a higher band score.

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