Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-07-26
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The graph illustrates about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040.
Overall, there were many ups and downs in Philippines. In Malaysia there was steady increased. In Thailand percentage of total population remained stable.
To begin with, in Philippines there were many ups and downs till 2020 in 1970 there was 30% of total population by the 1990 it was rised and came to 50% until 2040 it is predicted that there will be more than 50% of total population. In Thailand there was also rised in total population but it remained stable.
Moreover, in Malaysia there was sharp increased in 1970 there was 30% of total population by the 2024 it is predicted that it will be reached at 80% of total population. In Indonesia there was also up ward trend in 1970 it was less than 20% but by the 2040 it is predicted that it will reach at 60% of total population.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers all four countries and the time frame provided. However, the analysis is superficial and lacks a clear overview of the main trends. The description of the data is often inaccurate; for example, describing the Philippines as having 'many ups and downs' is a misinterpretation of the steady upward trend shown in the graph. Furthermore, the data points cited are frequently imprecise or incorrect, such as the claim that Thailand remained stable, when the graph shows a clear upward trajectory. To improve, you must focus on accurately identifying the key features, such as the highest and lowest points and the overall growth trends, rather than listing data points without context.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is mechanical and sometimes repetitive (e.g., 'In Malaysia there was...', 'In Thailand there was...'). The progression of ideas within paragraphs is disjointed, and the lack of clear linking words between sentences makes the flow feel choppy. To reach a higher band, you should use a wider variety of linking phrases to connect your ideas more naturally, such as 'In contrast', 'Furthermore', or 'Subsequently', and ensure that each paragraph has a clear thematic focus.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is quite limited and repetitive, relying heavily on basic phrases like 'there was' and 'total population'. There are also issues with word formation and collocation, such as 'there was rised' (should be 'there was a rise') and 'up ward trend'. The range of vocabulary is insufficient to describe trends with precision. To improve, you should learn specific collocations for describing graphs, such as 'witnessed a significant increase', 'remained relatively constant', or 'experienced a sharp decline', and ensure you use the correct parts of speech when describing changes.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Common issues include incorrect verb tenses ('it was rised'), missing articles, and awkward sentence structures. There is a lack of complex sentence structures, and the simple sentences used often contain errors in subject-verb agreement or preposition usage. To improve, focus on mastering the difference between active and passive voice, and ensure that you use the correct tense when discussing past data versus future predictions. Proofreading for basic errors like 'it will be reached at' (should be 'it will reach') is essential.
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