Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-07-29

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The provided line graph display information regarding percentage of the population living in four asian nations for with a time frame of 50 years, with upcoming prediction for 2030 to 2040.

Overall, the highest propotion of people are from Malaysia, whereas there was fluctuation pattern in philippines. while both Thailand and India showed a surge till year 2040.

Firstly, the percentage of total population with highest propotion was observed in philippines out of all till year 1990 with 50%. whereas in Malaysia there was same approach in the initial stage with small difference, but surprisingly it sky rocket till the year 2040. consequent ly in the part of philippines it

displays

show a fluctuation after 1990 till end of the time frame.

As in the part of nation indonesia it started with lowest percentage of population with just over 10%. therefore Thailand took a stagnant approach as same as philippines till 1990 with almost 20% of total population. At a certain point in year 2000 indonesia surpassed thailand and inclined drastically as compare to thailand which remain constant till the year 2020. Nevertheless indonesia final total population in the year 2040 expected to at 60%. whereas indonesia could see at almost 45% lower than philippines which can lie at 50%.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses the task by identifying the main trends, but the analysis is inconsistent and contains factual inaccuracies regarding the data. For instance, you mention the Philippines had the highest proportion until 1990, but the graph shows Malaysia and Thailand starting lower. The description of the trends is often confusing, such as the contradictory statements about Indonesia and Thailand. To improve, ensure you carefully track the lines for each country and report the data points accurately. While you cover the time frame and the four countries, the lack of precision in reporting the figures and the misinterpretation of the trends prevent a higher score.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into paragraphs, but the logical progression is frequently disrupted by unclear referencing and awkward transitions. Phrases like 'consequent ly in the part of philippines it' are fragmented and grammatically incomplete, which hinders the flow of information. While you attempt to use cohesive devices like 'Firstly', 'Overall', and 'Nevertheless', their usage is sometimes mechanical or incorrectly applied. The paragraphing is present, but the internal structure of the paragraphs lacks the necessary cohesion to guide the reader through the data comparisons effectively. Improving the use of linking words and ensuring each sentence follows logically from the previous one is essential.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'fluctuation', 'stagnant', and 'surged'. However, there are several instances of word-choice errors and spelling mistakes, such as 'propotion' instead of 'proportion', 'sky rocket' (should be 'skyrocketed'), and 'asian' (which should be capitalized). Some phrasing is unnatural, such as 'took a stagnant approach' or 'in the part of nation indonesia'. To reach a higher band, focus on using more precise academic vocabulary and ensuring correct spelling and collocations. The current level is sufficient to convey the general meaning, but the errors are noticeable.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors throughout. Issues include subject-verb agreement ('graph display' instead of 'displays'), incorrect verb tenses ('sky rocket' instead of 'skyrocketed'), and missing articles or prepositions. Punctuation is also inconsistent, with some sentences ending abruptly or lacking proper capitalization. While the meaning is generally understandable, the frequency of these errors requires the reader to work harder to interpret the intended message. Focusing on basic sentence construction and proofreading for subject-verb agreement will significantly improve your accuracy.

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