Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-07-30
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 6.5)
the chart is showing a timeline from 1970 to 2020 and the percentage of 4 Asian countries total population living in Cities of all respective countries. and also predicting the rise in total population percentage from 2030 till 2040.
Overall, with every passing year the rise in total population percentage towards cities is very evident. the country which is leading in fastest migration towards cities is Malaysia in 1970 only 30% of the population was living in cities which rises up to almost 75% until 2020. on the other hand, Thailand is showing slowest pace where only around 10.8% of total population was living in cities in 1970 which increases up to 3.2% until 2020. then there is Indonesia which started in 1970 with lowest percentage of total population living in the cities but later in 2020 crossed Thailand and Philippines the country which is in 1970 highest population living in the cities almost 30.2% but moving forward in 2020 percentage rises upto 45% only where Indonesia rose to 50.4% until 2020.
In summary, the countries which had lowest population living in the cities initially moved towards cities with fast pace until 2020 and predicted to be faster until 2040 in comparison with the countries which are already living in cities with major percentage.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
You have identified the main trends and provided a clear overview. However, there are significant inaccuracies in your data reporting. For example, you state Thailand's population in cities increased by only 3.2% to 2020, which contradicts the visual data, and your description of the Philippines' growth is confusing. While you attempt to compare the countries, the lack of precision in citing specific figures hinders the clarity of your report. To improve, ensure that you double-check the data points against the graph and focus on reporting the most significant changes rather than listing every detail, which can lead to errors.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5
The essay is organised into an introduction, an overview, and body paragraphs, which provides a logical structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat mechanical and repetitive. Phrases like 'on the other hand' and 'then there is' are used, but the flow between sentences is occasionally disjointed. The paragraphing is sufficient, but the internal cohesion within the second paragraph could be improved by using more varied linking words to connect the comparative data points more smoothly. The overall progression of ideas is clear, but the lack of sophisticated transitions limits the score.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.5
Your vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing you to describe trends such as 'fastest migration' and 'slowest pace'. However, there is a lack of variety, and some word choices are slightly unnatural, such as 'total population percentage towards cities'. You rely on basic descriptors and struggle with precise collocations related to statistical reporting. To reach a higher band, try to incorporate more academic vocabulary related to trends, such as 'upward trajectory', 'significant growth', or 'proportion of urban dwellers', and ensure you use these terms with greater precision.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0
You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent errors in grammar and punctuation. For instance, there are issues with subject-verb agreement ('the chart is showing', 'which rises up') and inconsistent tense usage when describing past data and future predictions. Additionally, the lack of proper capitalisation at the start of sentences and the misuse of commas make the text harder to follow. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to prevent a higher score. Focus on proofreading for basic sentence construction and tense consistency.
Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.
