Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-08-03

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The given graph illustrates the information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries who reside in cities from the year 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040.

Overall, greatest number of people lived in Philippines in the beginning but is predicted to have a fluctuating patterns in later years unlike Indonesia, Thailand and Malaysia whose population has and predicted to have increase by 2040.

In 1970, about 30% of Malaysian population resided in the cities. By 2020, there is a growth, twice as much, at 75% and it is predicted that by 2040 the inhabitant would increase at 85% . Like Malaysian citizenry, we can study that the population of Indonesia have similar pattern. Their population started with 13% and by 2020 it increase by almost three times at 50%. There is a prediction for the population of Indonesia to live in cities reach 60% by 2040.

Philippines has a very fluctuating pattern in the percentage of the populations living in urban areas. There were 31% of the total population during 1970 and by 1990 it soared up almost thrice as much at 50% but there was a decline after that and by 2010 it reached till 40% and have increase steadily from that point onward. Unlike Philippines population of Thailand has more steady growth at 19% of the population living in cities during 1970 and gradually inclined and is predicted to be at 50% by 1040.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response covers all four countries and the time frame provided. You successfully identify the main trends, such as the steady growth in Malaysia and Indonesia versus the fluctuations in the Philippines. However, there are some inaccuracies in data reporting; for instance, you state the Philippines had the 'greatest number of people' in 1970, which is a misinterpretation of the percentage data. Additionally, the overview is slightly confusing, as the Philippines does not show a 'fluctuating pattern' in the same way a volatile stock might, but rather a specific rise and fall. To improve, ensure you clearly distinguish between the countries and provide more precise comparisons between them.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, with an introduction, an overview, and body paragraphs. You use some cohesive devices like 'In 1970', 'By 2020', and 'Unlike', which help the flow. However, the transition between ideas is sometimes mechanical. For example, the phrase 'Like Malaysian citizenry, we can study that the population of Indonesia have similar pattern' is a bit clunky. The referencing is generally clear, but the progression of ideas could be smoother if you grouped the countries by their growth patterns (e.g., those with steady growth vs. those with fluctuations) rather than just listing them country by country.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'reside', 'inhabitant', 'soared', and 'gradually inclined'. However, there are some word choice errors and awkward collocations, such as 'greatest number of people' (when referring to percentages) and 'citizenry' used in a context where 'population' would be more natural. There is also a minor typo ('1040' instead of '2040'). To reach a higher band, focus on using more precise academic collocations and ensure that your vocabulary choices accurately reflect the data being presented.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, which is appropriate for this task. However, there are several grammatical errors that occur throughout the text. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('population... have similar pattern') and awkward phrasing ('it increase by almost three times at 50%'). There are also minor errors with articles and prepositions ('in the beginning', 'at 85%'). While these errors do not impede communication, they are frequent enough to prevent a higher score. Focusing on proofreading for subject-verb agreement and consistent tense usage would significantly improve your accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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