Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-08-04

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

This graph gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. The information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. The percentage of the population living in cities. Phillippines are on the top with almost 31% of population but on the other Malaysia has become their competitor with 30% of population. In addition Thailand has 19% population and Indonesia has almost 14%. For instance in 2040 the Malaysia becomes on top because for their population and on the other hand in 2040 Thailand becomes very low according to these countries.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0

The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 150 words, which significantly impacts the score. Furthermore, the content is underdeveloped. While you mention the four countries, the description of the data is fragmented and lacks a clear overview of the trends over the 70-year period. You have not effectively selected the main features or made sufficient comparisons between the countries. The analysis is limited to a few isolated data points rather than describing the overall progression or the significant shifts predicted for 2030 and 2040. To improve, ensure you provide a clear summary of the overall trends and support your points with more detailed data comparisons.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.0

The response lacks a logical structure. It consists of a single, short paragraph that does not follow the standard format for an Academic Task 1 report (Introduction, Overview, and Body Paragraphs). There is a lack of cohesive devices to link ideas; for example, the transition between the initial description and the data points is abrupt. The sentences are disjointed, making the progression of information difficult to follow. To improve, use clear paragraphing and transition words such as 'in contrast,' 'furthermore,' or 'meanwhile' to connect your ideas and guide the reader through the data.

Lexical Resource — Band 4.5

The vocabulary is quite basic and repetitive. You rely on simple phrasing such as 'on the top' and 'becomes very low,' which lacks the precision required for describing statistical data. There are also issues with word choice, such as 'competitor' to describe a country's population percentage, which is not appropriate in this context. The range of vocabulary is insufficient to demonstrate the ability to describe trends or fluctuations effectively. To improve, incorporate more academic vocabulary related to data analysis, such as 'proportion,' 'fluctuate,' 'projected,' and 'surpass.'

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5

The response contains several grammatical errors that impede clarity. There are issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'Phillippines are on the top') and awkward sentence construction (e.g., 'Malaysia becomes on top because for their population'). The sentence structures are mostly simple, and there is a lack of complex grammatical forms. Punctuation is also inconsistent, and some sentences are incomplete or confusing. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence structures and ensuring subject-verb agreement. Practice using complex sentences with relative clauses or subordinating conjunctions to improve your grammatical range.

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