Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-08-12
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The diagram below, demonstrate pecentege of the population living in four asian cities.
we have been noticing many aspect in detail, which one, really vary from the 1970 and 2020 years. if we will look at them we see for country phillippines, malasia, thailand and the last one indonesia.
in 1970 , the highest percentage was in phillippiness with 32% of population , lowest percentage of pupulation in indonesia between 10-15%
if we will move to 2020 year , population in percentage significantly increase . The first place took malaysia with 70-80%%, next one indonesia with 45-50%. indonesia despite that they were in last one in 1970 , in 2020 took the second place among four countries were really major contribute to country.
and if malaysia will keep up in this pace by 2040 thay still will be in the first place , and if indonesia will go up, if they will handle with other countries they will take the second place after malaysia.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response covers the main features of the graph, such as the 1970 and 2020 data points, and includes predictions for 2040. However, the analysis is somewhat superficial and lacks a clear overview of the overall trends. The student identifies the highest and lowest countries but fails to provide a cohesive summary of the general growth patterns across all four nations. Some data points are described with vague ranges (e.g., '45-50%'), which lacks the precision required for an Academic Task 1 response. To improve, ensure all countries are consistently referenced and provide a clear, distinct overview paragraph that highlights the most significant trends observed over the entire period.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay lacks a clear paragraph structure, with ideas presented in a somewhat disjointed manner. While there is a basic attempt to sequence information chronologically, the transitions between sentences are weak and often repetitive (e.g., 'if we will move to...'). The use of cohesive devices is limited and sometimes mechanical, which hinders the flow of the text. The response would benefit significantly from using clear paragraph breaks to separate the introduction, the main body features, and the concluding trends. Additionally, using a wider variety of linking words like 'consequently,' 'in contrast,' or 'furthermore' would improve the logical progression of the argument.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is quite limited and repetitive, relying on basic terms like 'increase,' 'go up,' and 'first place.' There are several spelling errors, such as 'pecentege,' 'phillippiness,' and 'malasia,' which detract from the professional tone required for this task. The student struggles with precise terminology for describing trends, often using informal phrasing. To reach a higher band, the student should incorporate more sophisticated vocabulary related to data description, such as 'climb,' 'surpass,' 'projected,' or 'proportion.' Improving spelling accuracy and using more varied collocations would also help in conveying information more effectively and professionally.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. There are consistent issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'The diagram... demonstrate'), incorrect use of articles, and awkward sentence structures, particularly in conditional clauses (e.g., 'if we will look at them'). The range of grammatical structures is very limited, consisting mostly of simple sentences with some unsuccessful attempts at complex ones. Punctuation is also inconsistent, with unnecessary spaces and missing commas. To improve, the student needs to focus on mastering basic sentence construction, ensuring correct verb tenses, and reducing the frequency of errors that disrupt the reader's understanding.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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