Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-08-12
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The graph illustrate population of four Asian countries.
The graph gives us information about of population of countries from [redacted phone] and also gives prediction of future [redacted phone].
The picture tells about four major Asian countries. Firstly i would like to talk about Malaysia whom population have grown dramatically in 1970 there were 30% population but as the time passes the it ha risen very steadily at the end of 2020 the population amount has gone to 75% and in future there is a prediction to go more higher about 80-85%. Secondly i will discus the Philippines there population have increase very slightly in 2020 there is still not much change and the future have been also predicted same.
On the third there is Thailand whose population has increased about 10% from [redacted phone] but in future there is an small difference between Philippines and Thailand population. Last but not the least here come Indonesia who has a major change in population in 1970 there was only 10% but now through the time its has rise eventually at the end of 2020 the amount goes to 50% and in the future it goes further beyond approximatley around 60% in coming years
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response addresses the task by identifying the main trends for the four countries. However, the overview is weak; it merely repeats the prompt rather than highlighting the significant trends, such as the overall upward trajectory of urbanization across all nations. While the data points for Malaysia and Indonesia are generally accurate, the descriptions for the Philippines and Thailand are vague and lack precise data comparison. The report would benefit from a clearer summary of the key features, such as identifying which country had the highest growth and which remained the most stable, rather than simply listing countries one by one.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay lacks a clear structure. It is written as a single block of text, which makes it difficult to follow. While there are some attempts at sequencing using words like 'Firstly', 'Secondly', and 'On the third', these are used mechanically and do not create a smooth flow of information. Paragraphing is essential for IELTS Task 1 to separate the introduction/overview from the body paragraphs. The lack of logical paragraph breaks and the repetitive nature of the sentence starters hinder the overall coherence of the response.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is limited and repetitive. Phrases like 'population have grown' and 'there is a prediction' are used repeatedly. There are also issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'go more higher' (should be 'increase further') and 'rise eventually' (which does not fit the context). The student relies on basic descriptive language, which prevents the essay from achieving a higher score. To improve, the student should incorporate a wider range of synonyms and more precise terminology related to trends, such as 'fluctuated', 'plateaued', or 'surpassed'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text that occasionally impede clarity. Subject-verb agreement is a recurring issue, such as 'whose population have increased' (should be 'has') and 'there population have increase' (should be 'their population has increased'). Punctuation is also problematic, with many run-on sentences and a lack of commas to separate clauses. The range of structures is limited to simple sentences, and attempts at more complex constructions are often marred by errors in tense and word order, such as 'the future have been also predicted same'.
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