Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-08-13
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The line graph illustrates the data of the individuals in percentage in four Asian countries during the period of 1970 to 2020 and the assumption for 2030 and 2040. The four cities are The Philippines, Malaysia, Thailand, Indonesia.
Overall, Malaysia is accounted for highest population among them, whereas Thailand population are least in graph.
In 1970, Malaysia individuals are noted around 30%. In addition, it was sharply increased in 2020 and it will be predicted to be rose at above 80%.
However, Indonesia was less than 4% from Thailand in 1970, Thailand was nearby at 19%, whereas both increased steadily and Thailand reached around 30% in 1990 but Indonesia was still 4% less, afterwards Indonesia increased slightly and reached at 30% in 2000 and Thailand show no change but Indonesia was increased significantly in 2010 and there is an assumption it will be reached above 60% in 2040 and same prediction for Thailand it will be reached around 50% in 2040. On the other hand, The Philippines people was tracked above 30% and slightly increased in 1980, somehow, In 1990 it increased significantly around 50% and drop in 2010 nearby at 45% but than there is a prediction it will be sharply increase in 2040 and reaches above 50%.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers all four countries and the time frame provided. However, the overview is weak; it incorrectly identifies Malaysia as having the highest population throughout the period and fails to capture the significant trends or the overall upward trajectory of urbanization. The reporting of data is somewhat mechanical, focusing on individual years rather than synthesizing the main features or making meaningful comparisons. For instance, the description of Indonesia and Thailand is cluttered with specific figures that make it difficult to follow the overall trend. To improve, focus on grouping the countries by their growth patterns and highlighting the most significant changes rather than listing every data point.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into paragraphs, but the logical progression is hindered by repetitive sentence structures and awkward transitions. Phrases like 'In addition', 'However', and 'On the other hand' are used, but they do not always accurately reflect the relationship between the ideas. The referencing is sometimes unclear, such as 'it will be rose' or 'same prediction for Thailand', which makes the flow of information disjointed. The paragraphing is present, but the internal structure of the body paragraph is dense and lacks clear signposting to guide the reader through the data comparisons.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The range of vocabulary is limited and often inaccurate. There are frequent errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'Malaysia is accounted for highest population', 'assumption for 2030', and 'it will be rose'. The student relies on basic verbs like 'increased' and 'reached' repeatedly. While the meaning is generally conveyed, the lack of precision in describing trends (e.g., 'nearby at 19%') and the misuse of terminology (e.g., 'assumption' instead of 'projection') prevent the response from reaching a higher band. More variety in reporting verbs and adverbs would improve the quality.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Issues include subject-verb agreement ('Thailand population are least'), incorrect passive voice usage ('Malaysia is accounted for'), and tense inconsistencies ('it will be rose'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with the use of commas and run-on sentences. While the student attempts complex structures, they are often faulty, which limits the overall accuracy of the writing. Focusing on basic sentence construction and proofreading for tense consistency would be beneficial.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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