Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-08-13
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
This given bar graph illustrates about percentage of the population living in countries from the year 1970 to 2020,with predictions for 2030 and 2040 also. It can be observed that the highest percentage of the population is recorded in Malaysia in the year 2040 with 80 percent and lowest is recorded in the year 1970 with 12 percent in Indonesia
on further analysis, it is vivid that Malaysia in the year 2030 is experienced second highest populated country and second lowest populated is Indonesia with 15 percent. On deeper analysis, in the year 2010 Indonesia and Philippines has the equal percentage of population similarly in year 2000 Indonesia and Thailand has equal percentage of population. Over the years Malaysia will become the most populated country among all
To sum up, Malaysia will be the most populated country in the predicted year 2030 and 2040 and we have seen that population has increased significantly from the year 1970 to 2040
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers the main features of the graph, such as the overall upward trend and the position of Malaysia as the most urbanized country. However, the analysis is somewhat superficial. You mention specific data points, but the comparison between countries is limited and lacks depth. For instance, you identify equal percentages in certain years but do not discuss the varying rates of growth across the four countries. To reach a higher band, ensure you provide a more comprehensive overview of the trends and highlight the most significant differences or similarities between all four nations throughout the period, rather than focusing primarily on Malaysia.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into paragraphs, which is a positive step. However, the logical progression is weak. The transition between sentences is often abrupt, and the use of cohesive devices is mechanical or repetitive (e.g., 'on further analysis', 'on deeper analysis'). Some sentences feel disconnected, making the flow of information somewhat disjointed. To improve, try using a wider variety of linking words and ensure that each paragraph has a clear focus. Referencing is also occasionally unclear, which affects the overall readability of the report.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the precision and variety required for a higher band. You rely on basic terms like 'populated country' and 'percentage of population' repeatedly. There is little evidence of less common lexical items or sophisticated collocations. Furthermore, there are some inaccuracies in word choice, such as using 'populated' to describe urban living percentages, which is technically inaccurate in this context. Expanding your range of descriptive verbs and nouns related to trends and data would significantly enhance your score.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response contains a mix of simple and some complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors. Issues include missing articles (e.g., 'in year 2000'), incorrect verb forms (e.g., 'is experienced second highest'), and punctuation errors. These errors are noticeable and occasionally cause the reader to pause, although they do not completely impede communication. To improve, focus on subject-verb agreement, the correct use of articles, and ensuring that your sentence structures are grammatically sound. Proofreading for basic errors before finishing would be highly beneficial.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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