Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-08-21
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The line graph illustrates the comparison of total population percentage of four Asian countries: Philippines, Malaysia, Thailand and Indonesia over fifty-year period from 1970 to 2020 with future analysis from 2030 to 2040.
Overall, Malaysia, Thailand and Indonesia observe an upward trajectory throughout the years whereas Philippines show fluctuation of upward and downward trend in the percentage of total population.
Malaysia and Indonesia show a visible upward trend reaching 75% and 50% of their total population in 2020 as compared to 30% and 13% in 1970. Thailand show slight changes reaching 30% in 2020 whereas Philippines depict fluctuations reaching 45% as compared to 13% in 1970.
Malaysia and Indonesia future predictions of total percentage represent the same upward trend as previous trend reaching 80% and 60% respectively. In contrast to the trend of Thailand and Philippines, they observe an upward trajectory reaching 45% and 50% respectively in the future analysis of 2040.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers all four countries and includes both the historical data and future predictions. The main features are identified, such as the upward trend for most countries and the specific growth in Malaysia and Indonesia. However, the analysis is somewhat superficial. For instance, the description of the Philippines as having a 'fluctuation of upward and downward trend' is inaccurate based on the provided graph, which shows a steady increase. Additionally, the comparison between countries could be more detailed; while you mention the percentages, you do not fully highlight the relative rankings or the rate of change between the countries effectively. To reach a higher band, ensure data points are interpreted more accurately and comparisons are more analytical.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is logically organized into an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs. There is a clear progression of ideas, moving from the general trend to specific data points and then to future predictions. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'Overall,' 'whereas,' and 'In contrast to,' which help guide the reader. However, some transitions are slightly mechanical, and the referencing could be smoother. For example, the phrase 'In contrast to the trend of Thailand and Philippines' is a bit clunky. Paragraphing is used appropriately, and the information is grouped logically by time period and country trends.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, allowing for clear communication. You use some topic-specific terms like 'upward trajectory,' 'fluctuation,' and 'future analysis.' However, the range is somewhat limited, and there are some minor inaccuracies in word choice, such as 'future analysis of 2040' which is slightly unnatural. To improve, try to incorporate more varied synonyms for 'increase' (e.g., 'climb,' 'surge,' 'growth') and more precise ways to describe data trends. The current vocabulary is sufficient to convey the main points but lacks the sophistication required for a higher band score.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are several grammatical errors. For example, 'Philippines show fluctuation' should be 'The Philippines shows a fluctuation' (subject-verb agreement and article usage). Similarly, 'Malaysia and Indonesia future predictions' should be 'Future predictions for Malaysia and Indonesia.' There are also issues with missing articles throughout the text. While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and the correct use of articles would significantly improve the accuracy of your writing.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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