Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-08-21
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The line graph compares the population of four Asian countries from 1970 to 2020, also predicting their future till 2040.
Overall, population in Malaysia and Indonesia witnessed similar trend, however the percentage for Thailand and Philippines fluctuated over the period. According to the predictions, Malaysia will record the highest number of population in the future.
The proportion of individuals in Indonesia started just over 10%, while it grew gradually over the next 50 years. In addition, Thailand's figure soared from just below 20% in 1970 to nearly 30% by 2020, whereas the number are expected to increase around 50%. The population of Malaysia reached its highest point of approximately 75%, while this figure is projected to climb to 80% by 2040. Moreover, the graph of Philippines varied constantly throughout the period, declining to roughly 43% before rising around 50%. The number were then predicted to soar approximately till 52% in 2040.
The population for each of the four countries were expected to increase in the next 20 years without any fluctuation, while Malaysia will record the highest figure, and the gap between it and the other three countries is expected to remain wide.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers all parts of the task by identifying the main trends and making relevant comparisons. You successfully highlighted the overall growth in Malaysia and the fluctuating nature of the other countries. However, the analysis is slightly hampered by inaccurate data reporting. For instance, you state that the Philippines 'declined to roughly 43%', but the graph shows a more complex pattern. Additionally, describing the population as 'number' is imprecise; in this context, you are describing percentages of the population, not raw numbers. To reach a higher band, ensure that data points are cited with greater precision and that the terminology accurately reflects the units of measurement provided in the prompt.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, an overview, and body paragraphs that group information by country. Cohesive devices such as 'In addition', 'whereas', and 'moreover' are used to link ideas, although some transitions feel slightly mechanical. The progression of ideas is generally clear, though the final paragraph repeats information already mentioned in the overview, which slightly affects the flow. To improve, ensure that each paragraph introduces new information or a deeper analysis rather than restating previous points, and try to vary the cohesive devices to make the writing feel more natural and less formulaic.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'witnessed', 'soared', 'projected', and 'fluctuated'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice, such as using 'number' to refer to percentages, which is a recurring issue. There is also a slight lack of precision in describing trends, such as 'varied constantly'. While the vocabulary is sufficient to convey the main points, it lacks the sophistication and flexibility required for a higher band. Focusing on more precise collocations and ensuring that terminology matches the data type (percentages vs. raw numbers) will significantly improve your score.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While you attempt complex sentences, there are several grammatical errors, particularly with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'population in Malaysia and Indonesia witnessed similar trend' should be 'a similar trend'; 'the number are expected' should be 'the figures are expected'). These errors occur frequently but do not impede overall communication. To move into the 7.0+ range, you need to increase the frequency of error-free sentences and ensure better control over articles and pluralization. Proofreading for basic agreement errors would be a highly effective strategy for improvement.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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