Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-08-23
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
As we know that for better facilities people migrate from one place to another so due to lack of facilities people move in four countries with the passage of time to Improve there life style from backward areas to big cities . So now we start a comparison between these countries that how much population travel to cities from 1970 to 2020. So let's check the graph and analyse the persentage. If we talk about the migration of Indonesian people there percentage of migration is increase wit the passage of time. At start there migration is quite low but as the time increased there migration increased. There public rapidly move towards the developed areas for obtaining better opportunities and secondly in Malaysia people move towards city areas . Now if we come to those remaining countries like Philippines and Thailand there graph have changed over the period of time some times migration increased or sometimes decreased but over all migration remains maintained. So as a whole comparison in two countries like Malaysia and Indonesia people move in one decade 2010 to 2020 but in remaining countries migration is in balanced conditions
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0
The response fails to meet the requirements of an Academic Task 1 report. Instead of providing a clear overview and selecting key data points, the response is written in a conversational, essay-like style. It lacks specific data points (percentages or years) from the graph, which is essential for this task. The description of trends is vague, using phrases like 'migration is increase' rather than citing the actual figures provided in the prompt. The response does not accurately reflect the data, as it focuses on general migration rather than the percentage of the population living in cities. To improve, you must present a clear summary of the main trends and support them with specific data from the graph.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.0
The response lacks a logical structure suitable for a report. It is written as a single, informal paragraph, which makes it difficult to follow. There is no clear introduction, overview, or body paragraphs. Cohesive devices are used in a very basic and repetitive manner, such as 'So now we start' and 'Now if we come to'. The progression of ideas is unclear, and the lack of paragraphing significantly hinders the flow of information. To improve, you should organize your report into distinct paragraphs: an introduction, an overview of the main trends, and specific details for each country.
Lexical Resource — Band 4.5
The vocabulary is limited and repetitive, relying on basic terms like 'migration', 'facilities', and 'move'. There are several inaccuracies in word choice, such as using 'migration' to describe urban population percentages, which is technically incorrect in this context. Spelling errors such as 'persentage' and 'wit' also detract from the quality of the writing. The range of vocabulary is insufficient to convey the data with precision. You should focus on learning topic-specific vocabulary related to graphs and trends, such as 'urbanisation', 'fluctuated', 'remained stable', and 'projected'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5
The response contains frequent grammatical errors that impede communication. There are issues with subject-verb agreement ('there percentage... is increase'), tense usage, and sentence structure. Many sentences are run-on or lack proper punctuation, making the text difficult to read. The range of structures is very limited, consisting mostly of simple sentences. There is a lack of complex sentence structures, which are necessary for higher band scores. You need to focus on basic sentence construction, correct verb tenses, and ensuring that your subjects and verbs agree before attempting more complex grammatical forms.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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