Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-08-24

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The given line graph illustrates the average proportion of population of four Asian countries who lived in cities from the period of 1970 to 2020, also the graph predicts the information for 2030 and 2040.

Overall, the most noticeable feature is that the population of Malaysia who lived in cities rose dramatically in 2040, while least number of Thai people lived in cities.

The population of Indonesian residents who lived in cities were 12% in 1970, while the figure rose steadily from 12% to 50% in 2020. Furthermore, in 2040, more than 60% of Indonesian people will started living in cities. In 1970, only 19% of Thai people lived in cities, although there was a sharp increase in the number of people in 2020 it rose to almost 25%. Moreover, the number of residents who lived in cities increased to 45% in 2040.

Only 31% of the Philippines people lives in cities in1970, while the number of people who lived in cities will dramatically increased 50% in 2040. The proportion of only 30% Malaysian people lived in cities in 1970, while it will show a sharp increase of 85% in 2040.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

You have successfully identified the main trends and provided data points for all four countries. However, the task achievement is limited by some inaccuracies in data reporting. For example, you state that the population of Malaysia 'rose dramatically in 2040', which is a prediction, not a past event. Additionally, you mention 'more than 60% of Indonesian people will started living in cities', which is grammatically awkward and slightly imprecise. To improve, ensure you clearly distinguish between historical data and future projections, and focus on making more precise comparisons between the countries rather than just listing individual data points for each.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, with an introduction, an overview, and body paragraphs. You use some cohesive devices such as 'Furthermore', 'Moreover', and 'while', which help to connect ideas. However, the progression of ideas is sometimes mechanical, and the referencing is occasionally unclear. For instance, the transition between the overview and the body paragraphs could be smoother. To reach a higher band, try to use a wider range of cohesive devices and ensure that the logical flow between sentences is more natural and less repetitive in structure.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'proportion', 'dramatically', 'steadily', and 'sharp increase'. However, there are some issues with word choice and collocation. For example, 'the population of Malaysia who lived in cities' is slightly wordy; 'the urban population of Malaysia' would be more precise. You also use 'number of people' repeatedly, which limits your lexical variety. To improve, focus on using more academic collocations and synonyms to avoid repetition and enhance the sophistication of your writing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally hinder clarity. For example, 'will started living' is incorrect; it should be 'will start living'. You also have issues with subject-verb agreement, such as 'Philippines people lives' instead of 'live', and 'the number of people... will dramatically increased' instead of 'will dramatically increase'. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to prevent a higher score. Focus on proofreading for tense consistency and subject-verb agreement.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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