Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-08-24
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
The graph illustrates population of four Asian countries between 1970 and 2020. Overall, the Mal
In 1970, there was a highest population country is Philippines, compared with Indonesia was a lowest population country during this year. From 1970 to 1990 the rapidly increase percentage in Philippines and decrease in Indonesia.
Moreover, 2000 to 2020, the suddenly new country appear name was Malaysia which was about more than 70% total population living in cities. Thailand value was gradually decreases less than 30 percent.
Furthermore, using the prediciation model between 2030 and 2040 the most popular country is Malaysia.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0
The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 150 words, reaching only 97 words. Consequently, the task is only partially addressed. While the student attempts to identify some trends, the analysis is fragmented and incomplete. Key features, such as the overall trends for all four countries, are not clearly presented, and the comparison between countries is underdeveloped. The response lacks a clear overview and fails to provide a comprehensive summary of the data provided in the graph. Due to the significant under-length and the lack of a coherent summary of the main features, the response is severely limited in its ability to satisfy the task requirements.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The response lacks a logical structure. While there are attempts at paragraphing, the ideas are not well-connected. The use of cohesive devices is mechanical and often misused, such as 'Moreover' and 'Furthermore', which do not effectively link the information. The progression of ideas is disjointed, making it difficult for the reader to follow the trends over the specified time periods. The response lacks a clear introduction and a cohesive conclusion, resulting in a fragmented presentation of the data.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The range of vocabulary is very limited and repetitive. The student relies on basic terms like 'highest', 'lowest', 'increase', and 'decrease'. There are noticeable errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'the suddenly new country appear name was Malaysia' and 'Thailand value was gradually decreases'. These errors, combined with the limited vocabulary, restrict the ability to convey information precisely. The student struggles to use academic vocabulary appropriate for a data description task, which significantly impacts the quality of the response.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5
The response contains frequent grammatical errors that often impede communication. There is a lack of control over basic sentence structures, with many sentences being incomplete or poorly constructed, such as 'In 1970, there was a highest population country is Philippines'. Subject-verb agreement and tense usage are inconsistent throughout the text. The range of grammatical structures is very limited, consisting mostly of simple sentences with errors. Complex structures are either absent or attempted unsuccessfully, leading to a lack of clarity in the information provided.
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