Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-08-31
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The line graph compares the information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities between years 1970 and 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040.
As an overall trend, it can be clearly seen that the percentage of population among four countries is gradually climbed up in compare to these countries initial percentage in 1970.
In 1970 populational rate of Philippines and Malaysia was almost similar and more than other two countries and it was 30%. However, from 1970 to 1980 Philippines ratio remained same but Malaysia showed a steady increase and it didn't show any fall throughout the years and it is predicted that in future 2040 may be it will rise to approximately 90% which is the highest. On the other hand, Thailand and Indonesia experienced contrasting trends throughout the periods . Basically, Indonesia showed upward trends from 1970 to the the nearest future. In contrast, from 1990 to 2010 Philippines showed a slumped from 48% to 40% then its percentage inclines to 58%.
In summary, it is clear that Except Philippines rest of the three countries showed upward trend.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers the main features of the graph, identifying the overall upward trend and noting key data points for the four countries. However, the analysis is somewhat superficial. While you mention the starting point of 30% for the Philippines and Malaysia, you fail to provide sufficient comparative data for Thailand and Indonesia in the early years. Furthermore, the description of the Philippines' trend is slightly inaccurate, as you describe a 'slump' and 'incline' without fully capturing the overall trajectory. To reach a higher band, ensure you provide more precise data points and make more consistent comparisons between all four countries throughout the period.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a summary. However, the use of cohesive devices is sometimes mechanical or awkward, such as 'In contrast, from 1990 to 2010 Philippines showed a slumped'. The transition between ideas could be smoother. Additionally, the referencing is occasionally unclear, and the summary sentence is slightly repetitive. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that each sentence flows naturally into the next would significantly enhance the coherence of your writing.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'contrasting trends' and 'steady increase'. However, there are several instances of imprecise word choice and collocation errors, such as 'populational rate' instead of 'urbanization rate' or 'percentage of population', and 'slumped' used as a noun instead of 'slump'. There are also minor grammatical errors in word form, such as 'inclines' instead of 'inclined'. To improve, focus on using more precise academic vocabulary and ensuring that word forms are used correctly in context.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, such as 'is gradually climbed up' (passive/active confusion), 'in compare to' (incorrect prepositional phrase), and 'the the' (repetition). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with spacing and capitalization. While these errors do not prevent the reader from understanding the main points, they occur frequently enough to limit the score. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and correct tense usage will help improve your accuracy.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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