Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-09-01
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The graph below illustrate the given information about the percentage of the population in four different Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with prediction for 2030 and 2040. The given four countries are Philippines, Malaysia, Thailand and Indonesia.
In Philippines, percentage of total population was around 31 in 1970, and it kept gradually increased till almost 43 in 1990, and then it gradually decreased in 2010 till 40. Again, it kept increasing till 2040, and the percentage of total population was 50.
In Malaysia, the population is much higher compared to Philippines. In 1970, the population was 30%. It kept increasing. It kept on increasing till 2040, and the population was almost 80%.
In Thailand, the percentage was lower than that of the Philippines and Malaysia. In 1970, it stood at around 20% and increased gradually to approximately 23% in 1990. The figure then remained stable until 2000, before rising steadily to around 41% by 2040.
In Indonesia, the population is higher than Malaysia but lower than Philippines and Indonesia. ln 1970, the population was almost 12% and it gradually kept increasing till 2040 and reached approximately 52%.
Overall, Malaysia stood as the highest compared to the other three countries.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers all four countries and the time frame provided. However, the analysis is somewhat mechanical, listing data points rather than synthesising trends. There is a significant factual error in the final paragraph: you state Indonesia is 'higher than Malaysia but lower than Philippines and Indonesia', which is contradictory and inaccurate based on the graph. Additionally, the overview is very brief and lacks a clear summary of the most significant trends, such as the overall upward trajectory for all countries. To improve, focus on grouping countries by similar trends and ensure the data reported is accurate and logically compared.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is repetitive and mechanical. Phrases like 'It kept increasing' and 'In [Country]' are used at the start of almost every sentence, which makes the flow feel disjointed. There is a lack of sophisticated linking words to show contrast or progression (e.g., 'whereas', 'in contrast', 'subsequently'). While the progression of ideas is generally logical, the repetitive sentence structure hinders the overall flow. Using a wider variety of transition signals would significantly improve the coherence of your writing.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks variety and precision. You rely heavily on basic verbs like 'increased' and 'kept increasing'. There is also a lack of precision in describing trends; for instance, using 'around 31' or 'almost 43' is acceptable, but the language used to describe the movement (e.g., 'gradually increased') is repetitive. There are also some minor errors in word choice, such as the confusion in the final paragraph regarding the comparison of countries. To reach a higher band, incorporate more varied reporting verbs and adverbs to describe the rate of change, such as 'surged', 'fluctuated', or 'remained relatively stable'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors. For example, 'The graph below illustrate' (subject-verb agreement), 'In Philippines' (missing article 'the'), and 'it kept gradually increased' (incorrect verb form). There are also issues with tense consistency and preposition usage. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to lower the score. To improve, focus on subject-verb agreement, the correct use of articles with country names, and ensuring that verb tenses are used consistently when describing past data versus future predictions.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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