Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-09-01
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The graph illustrates the population living in cities , the research includes four countries Philippines, Malaysia, Thailand and Indonesia during the period between 1970 and 2020 with estimation for 2030 and 2040 measured in percentage of total population .
In general, According to the graph Malaysia is the highest comparing with the three countries, which is strongly increasing during the period , although, Indonesia is considered the lowest even it is increasing in most of the time .
In 1970 , the four countries are most close by the percentage of the population living by scoring around 30% in both Philippines and Malaysia which are the first and the second and the last two are almost in 20% and 15% for Thailand and Indonesia , all the countries are facing a considerable raising except Philippines which has ups and downs during the period between 1970 and 2020.
Furthermore, the prediction are shown that by the year of 2030 all the countries will face a significant increase without exception, however , Indonesia that was the last in 1970 will be risen reaching to the second by almost 60% of total population, nevertheless, Malaysia will still the highest by around 90% of the total population
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers the main features of the graph, including the trends for all four countries and the projections for 2030 and 2040. However, the analysis is somewhat superficial. While you identify the highest and lowest countries, you miss opportunities to provide more precise data points or compare the rates of change more effectively. The description of the Philippines as having 'ups and downs' is a bit vague; a more analytical approach would describe the specific periods of fluctuation. To reach a higher band, ensure that all key features are clearly highlighted and supported with accurate data from the graph.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or slightly awkward. For example, 'In general, According to the graph' and 'nevertheless, Malaysia will still the highest' show issues with flow and punctuation. The transition between sentences could be smoother; some sentences feel like a list of observations rather than a cohesive argument. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring they are used with correct punctuation will significantly enhance the logical progression of your writing.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but it lacks the precision and variety required for a higher band. You rely on basic verbs like 'increasing' and 'rising' repeatedly. Phrases such as 'most close by the percentage' and 'last two are almost in 20%' are non-standard and slightly confusing. To improve, try to incorporate more sophisticated vocabulary related to trends, such as 'fluctuated', 'surpassed', or 'projected to reach'. Additionally, focus on using collocations correctly to ensure your meaning is conveyed clearly and professionally.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
There are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede the flow of the text. Issues include subject-verb agreement ('the prediction are shown'), missing articles, and awkward sentence structures ('Malaysia will still the highest'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with the placement of commas before conjunctions. While you attempt some complex sentences, they often contain errors that detract from the overall clarity. Focusing on basic sentence construction and proofreading for subject-verb agreement and article usage will help you achieve a more accurate and professional tone.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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