Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-09-08
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
The line graph provides detail about ratio of the population of four Asian countries living in cities over 50 year's period with predicted for next 20 years. (2020 to 2040).
Overall, it can be seen that all Asian countries population significantly rise over the period. In addition, population of Malaysia was highest while Indonesia at lowest at starting point.
In 1970, in Malaysia and Philippines people living in cities rate was same at around 30%. After, Malaysia became popular over the time and rose at 75% in 2020, it also very popular in predicted years. However, Philippines rose up to 50% in 1990 and declined at 40% in 2010, then slightly rose and reach same as 1990 population.
Furthermore, Thailand and Indonesia both population in 1970 at 19% and 15% respectively. The living ration of Indonesia dramatically rose up to 60% in the last predicted year. And the proportion of Thailand increased staidly at 10% lowest from the Indonesia in the final year.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The response covers all four countries and the time period provided. You successfully identified the main trends, such as the overall upward trajectory and the relative positions of the countries. However, the analysis is somewhat superficial. For example, the description of the Philippines is slightly inaccurate regarding the 2010-2040 period, and the comparison between Thailand and Indonesia in the final paragraph is confusingly phrased. To reach a higher band, ensure that data points are cited more precisely and that comparisons between countries are clearly articulated rather than just listing figures.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, with an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs. You use some cohesive devices like 'Furthermore', 'However', and 'In addition'. However, the flow is occasionally hindered by awkward phrasing and mechanical transitions. For instance, the sentence 'After, Malaysia became popular over the time' is not a standard way to transition between data points. Additionally, the referencing is sometimes unclear, making it difficult for the reader to follow the comparison between the countries smoothly. Improving the variety and accuracy of linking words would enhance the logical progression.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but it lacks the precision required for a higher band. You rely on basic verbs like 'rise' and 'increased' repeatedly. There are also some noticeable errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'living in cities rate' instead of 'urbanization rate' or 'percentage of the population living in cities', and 'staidly' (likely meant 'steadily'). To improve, try to incorporate more sophisticated vocabulary related to trends, such as 'fluctuated', 'surpassed', or 'projected to reach'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Common issues include missing articles ('at lowest at starting point'), incorrect verb forms ('population... rise' instead of 'rose' or 'has risen'), and awkward sentence construction ('The living ration of Indonesia dramatically rose up to 60%'). Punctuation is also inconsistent. While the meaning is generally understandable, the frequency of these errors prevents the writing from being considered highly accurate.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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