Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-09-09
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
The line graph illustrates the percentage of population and people living in four Asian cities between 1970 and 2020 as well as showing future predictions in 2030 and 2040.
Overall, Philippines had the highest proportion of people living in cities for most of the period and is expected to remain in first place. In contrast, Indonesia started with the lowest figure but is predicted to considerable growth. The Philippines showed some fluctuations while Thailand increased more gradually.
In 1970, around 30% of Malaysia's population lived in cities compared with approximately 32% in the Philippines. The figure for Thailand and Indonesia were considerably lower, at about 18% and 13% respectively. By 1990 the proportion in the Philippines had risen sharply around 48% while Malaysia reached approximately 45%. Thailand and Indonesia stood at about 32% and 25% respectively.
After 2000, Malaysia increased sharply reaching about 77% and is projected to reach 85% by 2040. Indonesia also rose steadily reaching about 52% in 2020 and is expected to reach 65% The Philippines is predicted to reach about 58% while Thailand may reach 52% by 2040.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The response covers all parts of the task, identifying the main trends and making relevant comparisons. You successfully highlighted the overall trajectory of the four countries and provided data points for the start, middle, and end of the period. However, there is a slight inaccuracy in the summary; you mentioned the Philippines had the highest proportion for most of the period, but the graph shows Malaysia overtaking it significantly after 2000. To improve, ensure your overview accurately reflects the final data points, as this is crucial for a higher band. The selection of data is generally good, though more precise comparisons between the countries in the final years would strengthen the analysis.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5
The essay is logically organized into an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs. The progression of ideas is clear, moving from a general summary to specific data points. You use cohesive devices such as 'In contrast', 'In 1970', and 'After 2000' to guide the reader. However, some transitions are slightly mechanical, and the referencing could be more fluid. For instance, the transition between the second and third paragraphs could be smoother to better link the general trends to the specific data. Overall, the paragraphing is appropriate and contributes to a coherent response.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'proportion', 'fluctuations', 'gradually', and 'projected'. There are some minor errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'is predicted to considerable growth' (should be 'is predicted to show considerable growth'). While you attempt to use less common vocabulary, the range is somewhat limited. To reach a higher band, try to incorporate more varied synonyms for 'increase' and 'decrease' and ensure that your collocations are precise, such as using 'experienced' or 'underwent' instead of just 'showed'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical slips, such as 'The figure for Thailand and Indonesia were' (should be 'The figures... were') and 'risen sharply around 48%' (missing 'to'). Additionally, the sentence 'Indonesia also rose steadily reaching about 52% in 2020 and is expected to reach 65%' lacks a full stop or conjunction before the final clause. While these errors do not impede communication, they are frequent enough to prevent a higher score. Focus on subject-verb agreement and ensuring all clauses are correctly punctuated.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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