Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-09-16

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

the graph illustrates the change in the number of people living in cities in fiur different asian countries in the years between 1970 to 2020 and with assumptions for 2030 and 2040.

overall, it is clear that the number of people living in towns increses overall, but we can also see number decreasing in some decades. It keeps fluctuating throughout the period.

Looking first at Malasia and Philippines the nuber was almost same at 30% in 1970 which assumed to went up around 90% and 55% respectively in 2040. Malysia also holds the highest number and lowest number remains in Thailand which is about 45%.

Turning to Indonesia the figure was 14% in 1970 which kept on incresing slightly every year. Tends to end up with 60% in 2040 which is the second heighest in the four countries which are given in the graph.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.5

The response attempts to summarize the main trends in the graph, noting general increases across countries such as Malaysia and Indonesia. However, there are notable inaccuracies and confusions in reporting the data. For instance, the writer states that Malaysia's figure 'assumed to went up around 90%' (it actually reaches about 83.5% in 2040) and incorrectly claims that Thailand holds the lowest number while stating it is 'about 45%' (Thailand starts at 18% in 1970 and reaches 49.5% in 2040). Furthermore, the response falls short of the 150-word minimum, containing only 144 words. This necessitates a penalty under Task Achievement for failing to meet the length requirement and for containing inaccurate data reporting.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay is divided into four short paragraphs, attempting an introduction, an overview, and body paragraphs for specific countries. However, the logical progression is weak. The overview sentence ("it is clear that the number of people living in towns increses overall, but we can also see number decreasing in some decades") is contradictory and confusing given that the chart displays percentages rather than absolute numbers and shows mostly upward trends with some minor dips. Cohesive devices are minimal and sometimes awkward ('Looking first at Malasia and Philippines', 'Turning to Indonesia'), and referencing is occasionally unclear.

Lexical Resource — Band 4.5

The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive, with frequent misspellings and imprecise word choices. Examples include spelling errors such as 'fiur' for four, 'increses' for increases, 'Malasia' for Malaysia, 'nuber' for number, and 'heighest' for highest. The writer also uses imprecise phrasing like 'assumed to went up' and 'kept on increses slightly every year'. The lexical range is adequate only for very basic communication and lacks the precision required for an academic task report.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5

The response displays a very limited range of grammatical structures. Most complex structure attempts contain serious errors, such as 'which assumed to went up around 90% and 55% respectively' and 'Tends to end up with 60% in 2040 which is the second heighest'. There are fundamental issues with subject-verb agreement, tense consistency, and missing subjects or auxiliary verbs. Punctuation is also sparse, with missing capitalisation for proper nouns and countries. Errors are frequent and consistently impede comprehension.

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