Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-09-17
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
The graph chart gives information about the percentage of the population in four countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020 with predictions for 2030 and 2040.
The percentage is so high in the Malaysia . The percentage is almost 85%in Malaysia. And the other side the percentage is so less in the Thailand. The percentage is almost 45%.
The Malaysia percentage is 30% but the percentage increases day by day. The percentage is 45% in 1990. But day by day population living in cities increased the total percentage is almost 85%in the year 2040. Second, the percentage 30% in Philippines. Almost same in the year of 1980. If a time in the population increased in the year of 1990 the percentage is 50%. But with the time the percentage is decreased the range is 40% in the year 2010. But with the time population continuously increased at the last year. The population in Thailand was increased 1990. The percentage is 30%. But with the time population increased at the last year the population is 40%. The last country is Indonesia the population start 10% but with the time population continuously increased at the last year
the population is 60% in the 2040.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.0 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response attempts to address the task by reporting information about the four countries from the graph, mentioning several figures such as Malaysia reaching 85% and Indonesia reaching 60%. However, the selection and reporting of data are quite disjointed and lack a clear overview. Key trends, such as the overall upward trajectory of all four countries over the 70-year span, are not synthesised effectively. Furthermore, the descriptions of individual country data contain inaccuracies and vague generalisations, such as stating 'the percentage is so high in the Malaysia' and repetitive phrasing regarding timeframes. While some main features are touched upon, the overall development and task fulfilment are restricted.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.5
The organisation of the text is weak. Although there is an introductory sentence, the body of the essay lacks clear logical progression and paragraphing is poorly handled, with almost all details lumped together in a single chaotic block of text following the introduction. Cohesive devices are either missing or misused, relying heavily on repetitive phrases like 'day by day' and 'with the time'. Referencing is frequently unclear, making it difficult for the reader to follow the progression of data across the different years and countries. As a result, the overall arrangement impedes smooth reading.
Lexical Resource — Band 4.5
The vocabulary used is very basic and repetitive. Phrases such as 'the percentage is so high', 'so less', and 'population continuously increased at the last year' demonstrate a very limited lexical range. There are noticeable word-choice errors, such as using 'so less' instead of 'much lower' or 'lower', and inappropriate preposition use ('in the Malaysia'). While the intended meaning can generally be understood, the restricted vocabulary and lack of precision cause strain for the reader and prevent access to higher band scores.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0
The response shows a very limited range of grammatical structures. Most sentences are simple, repetitive statements joined awkwardly, and attempts at more complex relationships are faulty. There are frequent grammatical errors, such as missing verbs ('The Malaysia percentage is 30%'), incorrect word forms ('population is decreased'), and awkward phrasing ('If a time in the population increased'). Punctuation is also sparse or inaccurate. These frequent errors cause difficulty for the reader and reflect a weak control of basic sentence patterns.
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