Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-09-17
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The line graph illustrates the information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in the Philippines, Malaysia, Thailand and Indonesia from 1970 to 2020 along with predictions for 20230 and 2040.
Overview, the Malaysian residents accounted for the highest percentage of the population estimate over the period, while the Indonesia has the lowest percentage population showing dramatic rise up to 2040.
The Philippines had of 31% population in 1970 followed by almost 50% in 2040. Although Thailand accounted for about 48% proportion in 2040 starting 18% in 1970.
Consequently, 30% population of Thailand and Indonesia are overlapped in 2000 followed by a 48% population of Philippines and Thailand also coincided in 2010. Whereas, percentage population of Malaysia and Philippines are partially overlapping from 1970 to 1990 then, followed the opposing trends.
The line graph demonstrates the shift in percentage of population in four different countries with fluctuations over the period.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response attempts to cover the main features of the graph, but it contains several significant inaccuracies in data interpretation. For instance, the student states that 'Malaysian residents accounted for the highest percentage of the population estimate', which is mostly true by the end, but describes Indonesia as having 'the lowest percentage population showing dramatic rise' when Thailand actually started lower in 1970. Furthermore, data points are frequently misread or incorrectly transcribed, such as claiming the Philippines had 'of 31% population in 1970 followed by almost 50% in 2040' (the chart shows 32% and 55.5%), and confusing percentages with years (e.g., 'predictions for 20230'). The overview is somewhat confused, and while some comparisons are attempted, the lack of precision and erroneous data reporting place this firmly in the Band 5 range.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is divided into multiple paragraphs, but the paragraphing is poorly handled, with a one-sentence introduction and a strange transitional sentence 'Overview, the...' starting the second paragraph. The progression of ideas lacks logical flow; sentences are often disjointed, and cohesive devices are used clumsily or incorrectly (e.g., 'Consequently, 30% population of Thailand and Indonesia are overlapped...'). Referencing is also problematic, as the student frequently attributes population percentages to countries' entire populations rather than urban dwellers (e.g., 'Malaysian residents accounted for the highest percentage of the population'). Overall arrangement shows some basic organization, but logical progression fails frequently, resulting in a Band 5 score.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is relatively limited and contains noticeable errors in word choice and expression. Examples include awkward phrasing like 'percentage of the population... living in the Philippines, Malaysia, Thailand and Indonesia' (the people live in the countries, but the graph measures the urban percentage), and misuse of words such as 'overlapped' and 'coincided' when referring to data intersections on a line graph. There are also typographical and spelling errors, such as '20230'. While the vocabulary is minimally adequate to convey a basic topic, frequent lexical inaccuracies and unnatural collocations restrict the score to Band 5.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The student attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but control over grammar is weak. There are frequent grammatical errors, such as missing prepositions or incorrect articles (e.g., 'the Indonesia has the lowest percentage population', 'had of 31% population', 'starting 18% in 1970'). Verb tense and voice usage are also flawed in places, such as 'followed the opposing trends' and awkward passive/active mixes. While meaning can generally be extracted despite the errors, they occur with high frequency and impede smooth reading, justifying a Band 5 score under IELTS guidelines.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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