Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-09-23

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

the line graph shows the rise of population in the cities of four different country cities form 1970 to 2020 and also shows predictions of rise the in population is cities for 2030 and 2040.

overeall population is increares in all four counties from 1970 to 2040.

the line graph illustrate malysia population shows high increase in cities population form the 30% to 90%. the population rise in cities in suddenly shows rise in form 1990. population of philippines is fultuate with time but it also increase but from 1970 to 1980 the population is steady but its percentage shows rise in from 30% to 50 % from 1980 to 1990, but fall suddenly to 40% in 2010. thailand population also stabe in and steady in between 1990 to 2020 with the percentage of 30%, but prediction show shows that its will be rise up to 50 %. same like other country the indonesia population in cities also rise with time form 1970 to 2020 up to 40 % and the prediction show that it will rise up tp 55% citiy population.

in conclution the cities population will be rise in all country.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

The response attempts to cover the main trends in the line graph, noting that the proportion of the urban population generally increased across all four countries between 1970 and 2040. However, the task achievement is significantly hindered by inaccurate data reporting and misinterpretations of the chart. For instance, the student states that Malaysia's urban population rises from 30% to 90%, whereas the chart peaks at around 83.5%. Furthermore, several details regarding the Philippines and other countries contain inaccurate figures and vague generalizations. While the overview is present, key comparisons between countries are lacking, and the data points selected contain notable errors. This aligns with a Band 5 descriptor, where the task is addressed only partially and key features are insufficiently or inaccurately developed.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

The text suffers from a major structural weakness as it is written as one continuous, poorly organized block of text with virtually no effective paragraphing, save for a brief opening and conclusion. There is a lack of clear logical progression throughout the body. Cohesive devices are either missing or misused, leading to a mechanical and repetitive feel. Phrases like 'same like other country' and 'in conclution' demonstrate basic linking attempts, but referencing and substitution are faulty, making it difficult for the reader to follow the flow of information. Paragraphing is not used appropriately to separate different countries or time periods. This performance reflects Band 4, where information and ideas are not arranged coherently and cohesive devices are inadequate.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.0

The lexical range used in the response is very limited and repetitive. Throughout the text, the student heavily relies on basic words such as 'rise', 'population', 'cities', and 'percentage', often spelling them incorrectly (e.g., 'overeall', 'increares', 'counties', 'malysia', 'fultuate', 'stabe', 'conclution'). There are frequent word-choice and spelling errors that occasionally impede communication, such as 'prediction show shows that its will be rise up'. Attempts to use less common vocabulary are either inaccurate or marred by severe spelling mistakes. This corresponds to a Band 4 descriptor, where basic vocabulary is used with frequent errors that strain the reader and obscure meaning.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.0

The grammatical range is extremely limited, consisting mostly of simple and attempted complex sentences that are heavily flawed. The response contains pervasive grammatical errors, including missing auxiliary verbs, incorrect verb tenses, and improper subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'the population rise in cities in suddenly shows rise', 'thailand population also stabe in and steady', 'it will be rise up'). Punctuation is also problematic, with run-on sentences and a lack of capitalization at the beginning of sentences. These errors are frequent and cause considerable difficulty for the reader in understanding the intended meaning, matching the criteria for a Band 4 level.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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