Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-09-25
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
5The line graph illustrates the detail about the proportion of the citizens in Phillippines, Malaysia, Thailand and indonesia nations residing in cities in 1970 and 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040.
Overall, the percentage of population in Malaysia,Thailand and Indonesia increased and Malaysia rose dramatically, while the proportion of Phillippines fluctuated throughout the period.
Looking at the details, the proportion of population of Philippines and Malaysia started at around 30% to 31% in 1970. Both were gradually increased to about 31.5% and 40% in 1980, then Philiphines overpassed to Malaysia and reach at 50% in 1990 and about 48% Malaysia in 1980. Then it declined steadily to reach at around 30% and Philiphines reached to 60% in 2000. Then philiphines climbed significantly again to reach at 75% in 2020 and finally both rose to reach at 80% and 60% in 2024.
The Thailand and Indonesia pecentage of population stood in 1070 at 19% and 12% and gradually increased to the final place in 2000 at 50% and 45%.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5
The response attempts to cover the main trends in the graph, such as mentioning that the percentage of the population in Malaysia, Thailand, and Indonesia increased while the Philippines fluctuated. However, the data reported in the body paragraphs is severely confused, inaccurate, and contradictory. For instance, the student claims that the Philippines reached 60% in 2000 and 75% in 2020, and mentions years like 2024 which do not appear on the graph. The overview is overly simplistic, and the overall selection and reporting of data fail to provide an accurate summary of the visual information, leading to a band score of 4.5.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0
The response is organised into rudimentary paragraphs, beginning with an introduction and followed by body paragraphs and an overview (though the overview is placed second). However, the logical progression is weak and confused by severe data inaccuracies. Cohesive devices such as 'Overall', 'Looking at the details', 'Then', and 'Both' are used mechanically or repetitively, and referencing is frequently unclear (e.g., 'both rose to reach at 80% and 60% in 2024' where it is ambiguous which countries are referred to). Paragraphing is attempted but lacks clear functional control.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive, with frequent spelling and word-choice errors. Examples include 'Phillippines' (misspelled), 'indonesia' (uncapitalized), 'detail' used instead of 'details', and inaccurate verb choices like 'overpassed' and 'pecentage'. While the student attempts some less common phrasing such as 'proportion of the citizens' and 'residing in cities', the high frequency of lexical errors and inaccurate data reporting limit the range and precision of vocabulary, resulting in a band 5.0.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The response demonstrates a limited range of sentence structures, relying mostly on simple sentences joined by coordinating conjunctions or basic time markers. Attempts at complex or passive structures are frequently faulty, such as 'Both were gradually increased' or 'The Thailand and Indonesia pecentage of population stood in 1070 at 19%'. Frequent grammatical errors, awkward prepositions, and tense inconsistencies occur throughout the text, though they rarely obscure the general topic of the sentences entirely.
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