Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-09-27

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

 

Student answer (Band 4.0)

THE BAR ILLUSTRATE THE PERCENTAGE OF TOTAL PIPULATION IN VARIOUS YEAR FROM 1970 TO 2040 IN SEVERAL COUNTRIES LIKE PHILIPPINES, MALAYSIA, THAILAND, INDONESIA.

IN YEAR 2040, HIGHEST PERCENTAGE OF POPULATION WOULD BE IN MALAYSIA IN THE COMPARED TO OTHER. THE LOWEST PERCENTAGE OF POPULATION WOULD BE IN THAILAND.

IN COMPARED TO 2040 WITH 1970, THE PERCENTAGE OF PEOPLE WAS HIGHEST IN PHILLIPINES AND LOWEST IN INDONESIA.

PHILLIPINES PERCENTAGE OF TOTAL POPULATION RANGES FROM 30 TO 80 ABOVE PERCENTAGES WHEREAS MALAYSIA POPULATION RANGES FROM 30 TO 50 PERCENTAGES,THAILAND POPULATION PERCENTAGE ALSO RANGES FROM 19 TO 45 PERCENTAGES WHEREAS INDONESIA POPOULATION RANGES FROM 12 TO 60 PERCENTAGE FROM YEAR 1970 TO 2040

THERE ARE DRASTIC CHANGES SEEN IN THE POPULATION OF MALAYSIA AND INDONESIA WHERE AS OTHER TWO COUNTRIES CHANGES STEADY .

SO OVERALL ,IN DIAGRAM ILLUSTRATE, THERE ARE SIGNIFICANT PERCENTAGES OF POPULATION INCREASES IN ASIAN COUNTRIES LIVING IN CITY LIKE MALAYSIA AND INDONESIA .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

The response attempts to address the task by discussing population percentages in the four countries from 1970 to 2040, but it falls short in several areas. Firstly, the student refers to the chart as a 'bar' when it is actually a line graph. Furthermore, the description of data trends contains significant factual inaccuracies; for instance, the claim that the Philippines percentage ranges from 30 to 80 above percentages does not match the actual data. While there is a rudimentary overview and some comparison attempted, the key features are not accurately reported, and the data is largely misinterpreted or confused. Consequently, the task is only partially addressed.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

The text is divided into short, disjointed blocks rather than standard paragraphs, which hampers the logical flow. Cohesive devices are used very minimally and sometimes incorrectly, such as in the phrases 'IN COMPARED TO' and 'WHERE AS OTHER TWO COUNTRIES CHANGES STEADY'. There is a lack of clear progression, and the relationship between ideas is often obscured by poor referencing and abrupt transitions between sentences. Overall organisation fails to guide the reader smoothly through the comparison of data.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.0

The vocabulary used is very basic and repetitive, with frequent errors in word choice, form, and collocation (e.g. 'BAR' instead of line graph, 'PIPUTATION' or 'POPOULATION' for population, and 'DIAGRAM ILLUSTRATE'). Less common lexical items are attempted but result in unnatural phrasing or incorrect terms. Spelling mistakes are noticeable (such as 'PHILLIPINES'). The vocabulary is just about adequate to convey a rudimentary topic, but the frequent lexical inaccuracies restrict the score to a 4.0.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.0

The grammatical range is extremely limited, relying heavily on simple sentence structures that are frequently marred by basic errors. There are missing auxiliary verbs, incorrect prepositions, and faulty tense usage (e.g. 'CHANGES STEADY' instead of remained steady, and 'IN DIAGRAM ILLUSTRATE'). Punctuation and capitalization are also erratic throughout the response. These frequent grammatical errors frequently impede communication and demonstrate poor control over basic sentence construction.

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