Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-09-30

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The line graph shows percentage of population in 4 different part of asian countries ranging from 1970 to 2020 with prediction for 2030 and 2040

Overall, All four countries are trends to increase in population with year. however, philippines was the highest of all, and indonesia been the second.

Philippines show significant growth from around 30 percent of population in 1970 to near about 80 percent in 2040.

while indonesia show slight raise from near 12 percent to just below 30 percent in 2000 then it sharply jump to near 60 percent in between 2030 and 2040

Thailand and malaysia trend to grow but in very small scale. Thailand population was near 20 percent on 1970 then it slowly increase to near above 30 percent by 20240 and malaysia was at near 30 percent in 1970 then fluctuate to near 50 percent in 1990 then it fall to near 40 percent in 2010 then it gradually increase to near 50 percent in 20240

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

The student attempts to address the task by describing the overall trends and data points from the line graph. However, there are significant factual inaccuracies in the data reporting. For instance, the student states that the Philippines had the highest percentage throughout and reached around 80 percent in 2040, whereas the graph shows Malaysia reaching the highest level at over 80 percent, while the Philippines only reaches 55.5 percent. Additionally, the student confuses the trends for Thailand and Malaysia in the final paragraph. While an overview is attempted, the severe data misreadings mean the response only partially satisfies the requirements.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response is divided into short paragraphs, but the overall organization lacks logical progression. The introduction is poorly structured ('percentage of population in 4 different part of asian countries'). Cohesive devices are minimal and mechanical, and the referencing is frequently confusing or incorrect, particularly when discussing the trends for individual countries in the body paragraphs. Paragraphing is haphazard, with the body sections failing to group information logically or clearly contrast the four nations.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.0

The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive, relying on simple terms like 'growth', 'raise', 'jump', and 'increase'. There are numerous word choice errors and unnatural phrasing, such as 'trends to increase', 'slight raise', and 'sharply jump'. Spelling and word formation are also problematic in places. The lexical range is limited and inadequate for a higher band score, restricting the precision needed to discuss statistical data effectively.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.0

The response exhibits a very limited range of grammatical structures, consisting mainly of simple and attempted complex sentences that contain frequent errors. Punctuation and capitalization are largely neglected (e.g., missing capital letters for 'philippines', 'indonesia', 'thailand', 'malaysia'). Grammatical errors, such as subject-verb agreement issues ('indonesia show', 'Thailand population was') and incorrect tense usage, frequently impede the flow of communication and distort the meaning.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.