Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-01

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The given bar graph shows that how many people living in cities of four asian countries in 1970 to 2020. And also predict the growing percentage in 2030 and 2040.

It can clearly seen that population of philippines and malaysian individuals were at thirty. But thailand or indonesia were at under 20%. in 1970 however,in 1980 to 1990 philippines and malaysians at 40%. Whereas,others were on below thirty. Athought from 2000 to 2020 indonesia and philippines were rised stregthly and reach at 70 and 50%.By predictors philippines can rised at peck in 2040. even thailand can reach at only sixty.whereas, thailand were at near 30% also in 2020 but malaysia show smoll decline in 2010 but accoding to the growth og 2020 they can reach near 50 and thailand can make big movement by rised by 20%

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

The response fails to meet the minimum word length requirement, falling short of the required 150 words at only 137 words. Furthermore, the task is addressed only minimally and tangentially. The student misidentifies the visual aid as a bar graph instead of a line graph and struggles to accurately report the main trends and data points. For instance, statements such as 'population of philippines and malaysian individuals were at thirty' misunderstand the percentage values and trends over the given period. The overview is weak, and the comparisons made between the countries are confused and lack clarity, resulting in a fragmentary treatment of the visual information.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

Information and ideas are not arranged in a fully coherent manner, and there is a lack of overall progression throughout the text. Paragraphing is rudimentary and chaotic, with abrupt shifts between sentences that make it difficult to follow the logic. While some basic cohesive devices are attempted, such as 'however' and 'whereas', their usage is often clumsy or inaccurate (for example, 'Athought from 2000 to 2020...'). The referencing of countries and years becomes confused, impeding the smooth flow of information from one sentence to the next and creating a disjointed reading experience.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive, struggling to accurately convey the statistical data presented in the graph. There are numerous word choice and word formation errors, such as 'rised stregthly', 'peck', 'smoll decline', and 'accoding', which stem from a very limited lexical range. Spelling mistakes occur frequently, and incorrect collocations or misused terms strain the reader's understanding. The student attempts some less common vocabulary like 'predict', but the execution is flawed due to inaccurate forms and inappropriate contexts.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

Grammatical control is weak, with a very limited range of structures and frequent errors that often distort meaning. The response contains persistent errors in basic sentence construction, verb forms, and tenses, such as 'that how many people living in cities' and 'thailand were at near 30% also in 2020 but malaysia show smoll decline'. Punctuation and capitalization are also erratic. While simple sentences occasionally appear, attempts at more complex structures are invariably faulty, leading to frequent grammatical breakdown.

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