Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-01

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The graph illustrate the proportion of percentages of Asian countries population in present day and in future which is philippines, malaysia, thailand and indonesia in between 1970 and 2020 with future for 2030 and 2020.

Overall the data shows calculate the percentage of population livivg in cities and predicition in future.The malaysia population in 1970 is 30% which increase steadily from 1970 to 2020 is almost which increased sharply is appeared to 70%. indonesia is the second one population increasing after malaysia in 1970 percentage of total population 10 to 20 in between and in presents days is reached 60%. Compare to the thailand 30% and philippines population is 40% in 2020.

In the next coming years in future the population is increasingly steadily in the vinicity of thailand and indonesia there are copoious housing societies with modern amenities perentages of population in 2040 is estimated 40% to 43% and indonesia in future population is almost 60%.

Philippines also in future 50% whereby malaysia will be 80%.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

The response makes an attempt to address the prompt by reporting some data from the graph regarding the four countries and their urbanization trends. However, the task is only partially fulfilled due to significant inaccuracies and a lack of clear development. For instance, the introduction states 'with future for 2030 and 2020', which contains a contradictory time reference, and the overview merely mentions that the data shows predictions in the future without summarising the main trends effectively. Furthermore, several data points are misreported or vague, such as stating Indonesia's percentage in present days reached 60% when the graph shows around 52% in 2020. The selection of features is limited, and comparisons between the countries are superficial, keeping the response at this band level.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The organization of the response lacks a clear and logical progression. While there is an attempt to separate the introduction, overview, and body details into paragraphs, the internal cohesion within these sections is weak and repetitive. Transitions between ideas are often abrupt or missing, making it difficult to follow the flow of information. For example, the second paragraph abruptly jumps between Malaysia and Indonesia without clear comparative markers. Additionally, referencing is frequently unclear, and cohesive devices are either inadequate or inaccurate, resulting in a disjointed structure that fails to guide the reader smoothly through the summary.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The vocabulary used is limited and repetitive, reflecting a basic range that is only minimally adequate for the task. Throughout the text, there are noticeable word-choice and word-form errors that occasionally cause difficulty for the reader, such as writing 'livivg' instead of 'living', 'predicition' instead of 'prediction', and 'vinicity' instead of vicinity. The student attempts to use some less common phrases like 'copoious housing societies with modern amenities', but these attempts are unnatural and contain inaccuracies in collocation and style. Spelling mistakes and inappropriate vocabulary choices recur, preventing the response from achieving a higher lexical band.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The grammatical structure of the response is heavily limited, featuring frequent errors that frequently cause difficulty and strain for the reader. The text relies on simple sentence forms, and attempts at more complex structures are often faulty and poorly constructed, such as 'The malaysia population in 1970 is 30% which increase steadily from 1970 to 2020 is almost which increased sharply is appeared to 70%.' There are frequent errors in verb tenses, subject-verb agreement, and missing articles or prepositions throughout the writing, for example omitting auxiliary verbs and mixing past and present timeframes inappropriately. Punctuation is also sparse and poorly controlled, contributing to run-on and confusing sentences.

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