Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-02

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

 

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The line graph illustrates the information about the proportion of the population in four asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020 as well as with predictions for 2030 and 2040.

Overall, it can be seen that Philippines showed an upward trend,whereas Indonesia experinced the opposite pettern. It is also noticable that highest proportion of Malaysia and Thailand recorded the lowest figure thourghout the period.

Looking first at Malaysia, the figure stood at 30% of the total population in 1970, before rising to 70% in 2020.It then increased prediction further, is that reaching 80% of population in 2040. Meanwhile, Phillippines accounted for 30% population in 1970 after then flucuated throughout the period and reaching population of % prediction in 2040.

Turning to Thailand,the figure started at 15% of population and increased relatively until the year, It subsequently rose to 60% prediction of population in 2040. By comparision, Indonesia followed a similar trend, changing from 20 to 40. Overall,the most noticeable change was seen in Indonesia between 1970 to 2040.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response4.0
Coherence and Cohesion5.0
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.0
Overall5.0

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

The response attempts to address the prompt by describing the given line graph, but it suffers from significant inaccuracies regarding the data. For instance, the student states that Indonesia experienced the opposite pattern to an upward trend, yet Indonesia's figures actually rose substantially from 14% to 64%. Furthermore, the description of specific data points contains severe confusion, such as claiming the Philippines accounted for 30% in 1970 and later reaching an incoherent percentage of % prediction. The overview provided is inaccurate and contradictory, as Malaysia clearly recorded the highest figures while Thailand and Indonesia started lower. Key features are misrepresented or missing, and the attempt to report data relies on flawed information rather than a clear summary of the main trends.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

There is some basic organization evident in the response, with an introduction and separate body paragraphs examining different countries. However, there is no clear overall progression or logical structure guiding the reader through the data. Cohesive devices are used minimally and sometimes inaccurately, such as the awkward transition 'before rising to 70% in 2020.It then increased prediction further'. Paragraphing is attempted, but internal referencing is frequently unclear, leaving the reader confused about which country or year is being discussed. To improve, the writer needs to establish a clearer logical flow between sentences and use cohesive devices more naturally to signal comparisons and trends.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The vocabulary used is limited and barely adequate for the task. The student makes noticeable errors in word choice, spelling, and collocation that occasionally cause difficulty for the reader, such as writing 'experinced' instead of 'experienced', 'pettern' instead of 'pattern', and 'noticable' instead of 'noticeable'. There are also awkward phrasings like 'increased prediction further' and incomplete expressions such as 'reaching population of % prediction'. While the writer attempts some less common terms like 'proportion' and 'trend', the inaccuracies restrict the precision of the writing. Enhancing control over basic vocabulary and learning proper collocations related to data description will help lift this score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The text displays a very limited range of sentence structures, and attempts at complex sentences are frequently faulty. There are frequent grammatical errors involving verb tenses, articles, and sentence fragments, such as 'before rising to 70% in 2020.It then increased prediction further, is that reaching 80% of population in 2040.' Punctuation is also problematic, with missing spaces after periods and commas. Basic sentence construction breaks down in several places, particularly when attempting to incorporate predictions, leading to ungrammatical strings like 'reaching population of % prediction in 2040.' Greater control over simple and complex sentence forms is needed to reduce error frequency.

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