Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-02

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

This line graph illustrates the percentage of people living in urban areas in four different countries, over the period of 70 years. The graph depicts the current and predicts the future numbers about the population trend in various countries.

The urban population of Malaysia has increased very signficantly. It just made 30 perecent of their total population in 1970. In the timespan of just 50 years, it has risen to more than 70 percent. The future predictions expect it to surpass the mark of eighty percent by the year of 2040. In the case of Thailand there was an rise but it was not as pronounced as the trend of Malaysia. Thailand is expected to have 40 percent of their population in city centres by 2040.

Thailand has shown the most peculiar trend in its urban population, as it grew to about 50 percent by the year of 1990 and then it plummeted to the figure of 40 percent. Its population is rising again and is expected to be 50 percent by the end of graph. Inodensia had the fluctuating increase in population,less in sm

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.5

The response only partially addresses the task requirements and suffers from significant inaccuracies when reporting the visual data. For example, the student claims that Thailand 'grew to about 50 percent by the year of 1990 and then it plummeted to the figure of 40 percent,' which directly contradicts the graph where Thailand's urban population was only 30 percent in 1990 and steadily rose rather than plummeted. Furthermore, the description of Malaysia's starting point is inaccurate (stating it was 30 percent in 1970 when it was actually lower, though closer to the mark), and the response tails off abruptly into fragment sentences like 'Inodensia had the fluctuating increase in population,less in sm' before the text cuts off completely. This lack of completion, coupled with major misinterpretations of data points and trends, prevents the response from developing a coherent or accurate summary of the main features.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

The organization of the text shows some basic structure, but it lacks clear overall progression and logical sequencing. Paragraphing is attempted, but the paragraphs do not follow a logical plan; for instance, Thailand is mentioned briefly in the second paragraph, then returned to in the third paragraph with conflicting and confused information. Cohesive devices are basic and sometimes misused, leading to a disjointed reading experience. Referencing is frequently unclear, and the abrupt ending of the text leaves the essay unfinished, disrupting any sense of cohesion. To reach a higher level, the student needs to group data logically into distinct thematic or comparative paragraphs and ensure that transition words connect ideas smoothly rather than mechanically.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is limited and barely adequate for the task. There are noticeable lexical and spelling errors that occasionally impede communication, such as 'signficantly' instead of significantly, 'perecent' instead of percent, and 'Inodensia' instead of Indonesia. The student attempts some less common vocabulary items like 'plummeted' and 'pronounced', but these are either used incorrectly based on the chart data or lack precision. To improve, the student should focus on accurate spelling, correct word forms, and using precise vocabulary to describe statistical trends, such as 'rose steadily' or 'gradual increase' instead of vague or inaccurate descriptors.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The grammatical range is quite limited, relying mostly on simple and basic complex sentences. There are frequent grammatical and punctuation errors that cause difficulty for the reader, including article misuse ('in city centres' instead of in cities), preposition errors ('rise in' versus 'rise of'), and awkward clause structures. For example, the sentence 'It just made 30 perecent of their total population in 1970' demonstrates poor grammatical control and unnatural phrasing. Attempts at complex sentences often result in faulty structures and confusion. To achieve a higher score, the student needs to demonstrate a greater variety of complex sentence forms with improved accuracy in verb tenses, subject-verb agreement, and articles.

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