Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-04

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

population in the Asian 4 countries

The graph shoes that the percentage of the living people in cities from 1970 into 2020 shown in the graph and to tell about the future living cities in 2030 to2040. In the graph, the Malaysia is having high percentage 80% plus rather than other countries in 2040 year. it means these countries having a good future living cities in 2030 to 2040 as the graph show.

if we see other countries in graph Indonesia, and phillppines . These two countries are are also more than 50% of the another country which only left is Thailand . but all these countries are having a good percentage according to future 2030 to 2040.

In conclusion, if these countries growth more and their population become more than these cities, population will increase more than 80%. and then these countries become a good place for visiting a tourism and attracting and become clean country

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

The response addresses the task only minimally and tangentially, which reflects a basic attempt to engage with the prompt. The writer manages to identify a few scattered data points, such as mentioning that Malaysia reaches '80% plus' by 2040, but the selection of information is very limited and fails to provide a comprehensive summary of the main features across all four countries. Furthermore, there is no clear overview presented, and the conclusions drawn in the final paragraph drift off-topic into speculative commentary about tourism and cleanliness rather than summarising the visual data. Key comparisons between the countries throughout the 1970 to 2040 timeframe are largely absent, leading to an underdeveloped and incomplete response.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

Information and ideas are not arranged coherently in this response. The text lacks a clear overall progression or logical structure, jumping abruptly between observations of individual countries without a guiding thread. Paragraphing is attempted, but the breaks are illogical, splitting related ideas across weak boundaries. Cohesive devices are either missing or misused, with repetitive referencing such as 'In the graph, the Malaysia...' and 'if we see other countries in graph Indonesia, and phillppines'. This mechanical and faulty use of cohesive ties, combined with confusing transitions, makes the progression difficult to follow and detracts significantly from the readability of the text.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive, employing very limited terms to describe the data, such as 'high percentage', 'good percentage', and 'population increase'. There are noticeable lexical errors, including awkward word choices and collocations like 'living people in cities', 'future living cities', and spelling issues such as 'phillppines'. These errors stem from an inadequate range of vocabulary and strain the reader's understanding at times. The writer attempts to discuss trends and predictions, but lacks the specific lexical resource needed to convey precise statistical changes or comparative language, restricting the response to a simplistic level.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response displays a very limited range of grammatical structures, relying heavily on basic, repetitive sentence patterns. Attempts at more complex structures or longer sentences are consistently faulty, as seen in problematic clauses like 'The graph shoes that the percentage of the living people in cities from 1970 into 2020 shown in the graph and to tell about...'. Errors are frequent throughout the text, including missing or incorrect articles, preposition errors such as 'in 2040 year', subject-verb agreement issues like 'the Malaysia is having', and non-standard verb forms. These frequent errors and distorted sentence boundaries cause considerable difficulty for the reader and reflect a weak control of basic grammatical patterns.

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