Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-05

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The line graph represents the data of people living in four asian countries in city from the year 1970 to 2020 and also it shows the prediction for the year 2030 and 2040.

The line graph shows Malaysia had shown the increasing trend every decade starting from 30% and will be stable at 2030 with 80%. Philippines had shown no visible change till 1980 with 32% but shown the rise of 20% by the end of 1990. After that it starts decreasing by 10% by the end of 2010 and its shows a slight rise by 10% and become stable at 50% by the end of 2040.

Thailand and Indonesia show are rising trend.

Thailand recorded as 18% in 1970 and intersect Indonesia in 2000. It predicts the data of people to be 45 by the end of 2040. Similarly Indonesia start from 15%, rise and reach 60% by the end of 2050.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

The response engages minimally with the task, achieving a restricted coverage of the provided chart. While the general subject of urban population trends in four Asian countries is identified, the selection of data is disjointed and contains numerous inaccuracies. For example, the student claims Malaysia will be stable at 2030 with 80% (when the graph shows 81%), and states incorrect figures for Indonesia such as starting from 15% and reaching 60% by the end of 2050 (whereas the graph ends at 2040). The overview is extremely weak, consisting of just a single sentence that fails to synthesize the main trends adequately. To reach a higher level, the writer needs to ensure all data points are accurately transcribed and provide a clearer, more comprehensive overview of the overall trends.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response displays some basic organization, separating the introduction, body paragraphs, and a brief conclusion, but there is no clear overall progression of ideas. Paragraphing is disjointed, with a single-sentence paragraph acting as an overview and another very brief section at the end. Cohesive devices are minimal, repetitive, and sometimes inaccurate, such as relying heavily on repetitive structural openings like 'The line graph shows' and 'Philippines had shown'. Additionally, referencing and logical sequencing between sentences are weak, leading to a disjointed reading experience. To improve, the writer should use a wider variety of cohesive links and ensure that ideas flow logically from one sentence to the next without abrupt transitions.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive, struggling to convey precise mathematical or comparative meaning. The student relies on simple terms like 'rise', 'stable', and 'show', often with awkward word choice and word formation errors, such as writing 'asian countries in city' instead of 'urban population in Asian countries', and 'rising trend' versus 'are rising trend'. Spelling and basic lexical control are generally adequate for basic communication, but there is a lack of less common vocabulary or paraphrasing skills. To achieve a higher band score, the writer must incorporate a broader range of vocabulary, including precise synonyms for upward and downward trends, and ensure correct word forms and collocations.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The grammatical range is quite limited, consisting primarily of simple and attempted complex sentences that contain frequent errors. There are noticeable issues with verb tenses and auxiliary verbs, such as 'Malaysia had shown the increasing trend', 'Thailand recorded as 18%', and 'It predicts the data', where voice and tense are misused. Punctuation and article usage also show frequent errors that occasionally hinder clarity, such as missing articles before countries or cities. To progress, the writer needs to demonstrate a greater variety of error-free complex structures and maintain tighter control over tense consistency when describing past data alongside future predictions.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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