Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-08

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The line graph illustrate information about praportion of population in four Asian nations living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040.

Overall, Philippines was begin with highest population while Indonesia was started from lowest population and showed a dramatic change in future. Malaysia showed more fluactuation.

In 1970, the population of phillippines started at a highest number of population at 31% then increased slightly 32% in 1980, just before the considerable rose at 49% by 1990. the decline rate at 45% in 2000 meanwhile in future it will increase, it reach at the 52% in 2040. Malaysia with 20% at 1970 then it dramatically showed

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.5

The response identifies the topic and attempts an overview, noting that Indonesia began at the lowest level and that Malaysia changed substantially. However, the overview is inaccurate: the Philippines did not start highest (Malaysia was close, and the Philippines was only slightly above it), and Malaysia’s trend was strongly upward rather than fluctuating. Several figures are misreported, including the Philippines at 31% in 1970 and 32% in 1980, and Malaysia at 20% in 1970; the chart shows approximately 32%, 34%, and 30%, respectively. The response also stops before covering the other countries or the full period. It is 97 words, below the required 150, so the report is substantially incomplete. Add a clear overview and accurate comparisons across all four series.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

There is a basic attempt to organise the report, with an introductory sentence, a separate overview, and a detail paragraph beginning with the Philippines. This gives the reader some sense of the intended structure. However, the response ends abruptly during the Malaysia discussion, so there is no progression through the remaining data or a complete comparison. Connections between details are also limited: “just before” and “meanwhile” do not clearly express the relationships between the years and trends. The overview’s claims are not consistently supported by the details that follow. To improve, group information logically—for example, describe the rising Malaysia and Indonesia trends together, then compare them with the Philippines and Thailand—and use clear time markers and comparison phrases.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The response uses some task-relevant vocabulary, including “line graph,” “population,” “increased,” “decline,” and “predictions,” so the subject is generally recognisable. There are also attempts at more descriptive language, such as “considerable rise” and “dramatic change.” However, the range is limited and several word choices or forms are inaccurate or awkward, including “praportion,” “fluactuation,” “at a highest number of population,” and “decline rate.” These errors make parts of the report less clear and reduce precision. Use standard trend language consistently, such as “the proportion rose,” “fell,” “remained stable,” or “was projected to reach.” Check spelling and choose collocations that describe percentages rather than population counts.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response attempts both simple and more extended sentences, and the opening sentence communicates the chart’s subject. However, grammatical control is inconsistent. For example, “The line graph illustrate” has subject–verb disagreement, while “Philippines was begin” and “Indonesia was started” use incorrect verb forms. The sentence beginning “In 1970” runs through several time points with unclear punctuation and tense shifts, making the sequence difficult to follow. Articles and sentence boundaries are also problematic, as in “at a highest number” and the unfinished final clause, “Malaysia with 20% at 1970 then it dramatically showed.” Use past tense for recorded years and future or projected forms for forecasts, and separate each country’s trend into complete sentences. This will make the information easier to understand.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.