Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-09

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

 

Student answer (Band 4.0)

graph show the population of the four asian country and this graph show the indonesia population in 1970 the percentage of the population is 12% and in 1980 it go to the 13% and in the 1990 it go to the 21% and in 2000 it go to the 23% and in 2010 it is in 37% and in the 2020 it almost go to the 47% and in thailand the population in 1970 it is 19% and in 1980 it is increase and go to the 20%and in the 1990 it is increase to 27% and in 2000it is increase very quickly and go to the 28% and in 2010 it is also increase and go to 29% and in 2020 it is go to 30 percent in malaysia 1970 the population is round about 30% and in the 1980 it also increase to the 40% and in the 1990 it increase 41%in 2000 the population go to the 60 percent and in the 2010 the population increase 70% and in 2020 it increase to the 75%philippines population in the

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

The response identifies several relevant country trends and includes figures for Indonesia, Thailand and Malaysia, so it does engage with the graph. However, it mainly lists year-by-year values rather than summarising the main features, and it gives no clear overview of the overall comparisons. Several figures are inaccurate: for example, Indonesia is reported at 12% in 1970 and 47% in 2020, compared with approximately 14% and 52%; Thailand is given as 30% in 2020 rather than about 34%. The Philippines section is unfinished, and the later years and forecasts are not covered. To improve, state the key contrasts first—such as Malaysia becoming the most urbanised and Indonesia rising strongly—and support these with accurate selected figures.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 3.5

There is a basic sequence through the countries and years, which gives the reader some sense of how the information is organised. However, the response is presented as one long, largely unpunctuated sentence, with country sections running into one another. Repeated wording such as “in the 1990 it go” and “it increase” makes the progression mechanical, while the shift from Malaysia to the Philippines is abrupt and the final thought is incomplete. Use separate paragraphs or clearly separated sentences for the overview and country comparisons. Linking phrases such as “By contrast” or “Meanwhile” would help show relationships between trends rather than simply listing each year.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The response uses a small set of relevant terms, including “population,” “percentage,” “increase” and “go to,” and the reader can generally identify the subject of each section. However, vocabulary is basic and highly repetitive, with “increase” and “go to” used for nearly every change. Some expressions are imprecise or awkward, such as “the population of the four asian country,” which does not clearly describe the proportion living in cities. More accurate task vocabulary—such as “urban population,” “rise,” “reach” and “remain”—would allow clearer comparisons. Check spelling and word forms as well, including capitalising country names and using “countries” rather than “country” when referring to all four.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.0

The response attempts to report changes over time using simple clauses, but sentence structures are very limited and errors occur throughout. Examples include “in 1980 it go to the 13%,” “in the 1990 it go,” and “the population is increase,” where verb forms and tense are not controlled. Articles and sentence boundaries are also problematic, as in “in the 1990” and the continuous run-on from one country to the next. These errors sometimes make the relationships between figures difficult to follow. Practise forming concise past-tense sentences, for example, “Indonesia’s urban share rose from about 14% in 1970 to 25% in 1990,” and use full stops to separate each comparison.

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