Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-13

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

 

Student answer (Band 6.5)

The line graph below tracks the population percentage in four asian countries - Philippines, Malaysia, Thailand and Indonesia, over a period of 50 years from 1970 to 2020 with the predictions for next 20 years as well.

Overall, Indonesia had the lowest population in the 70s while the philippines contributed the highest in the same period. Malaysia saw the highest surge over the 5 decade period, whereas Thailand and philippines saw a decline and were the lowest over the end of the period.

In 1970s, Philippines was the largest contributor in population percentage at 31%, with Malaysia following next at 30%. Thailand and Indonesia were the smallest share holder at just under 20%. Population in malaysia surged and reached 75% in 2020, while Philippines which started strong reached only 47%. Indonesia starting with the smallest share overtook thailand in 2000 at 28% followed by Philippines in 2010 at 45% respectively, and was the second highest contributor at 50% after Malaysia at the end of the period.

Thailand saw a steady increase but only managed to stay under 30% in 2020. Furthermore, the future predictions also forecast the same trend with the increase in percentages. Malaysia at just over 80%, while Indonesia second to it contributing at 60%. Thailand still remains the lowest with 45% in population percentage, whereas Philippines at just over 50%.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You identify the main overall pattern: Malaysia rises strongly and is projected to remain highest, while Indonesia grows from the lowest starting point and becomes a leading urbanised country. You also compare the four countries and include both historical data and forecasts. However, some details are inaccurate or unclear: the Philippines is not the highest in 1970 (it is only slightly above Malaysia), and Thailand and the Philippines do not both decline overall; Thailand rises throughout, while the Philippines fluctuates. Thailand is also not below 30% in 2020, at about 34%. The overview therefore captures key features but does not fully represent the trends accurately. More precise comparisons and a clearer account of the Philippines’ fluctuations would strengthen the report.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear four-paragraph structure, moving from an introduction and overview to historical details and then forecasts. This gives the reader a coherent overall route through the information. Comparisons such as Indonesia overtaking Thailand and later approaching the Philippines help connect the data. However, some links are difficult to follow: “followed by Philippines in 2010 at 45% respectively” is unclear, and “the same trend” does not specify which trend is meant. The overview also groups Thailand with the Philippines as declining, which disrupts the logical account of the graph. Use clearer time-based grouping and explicit references to the countries and trends to make the progression more precise and less dependent on broad linking phrases.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use a reasonable range of vocabulary for describing trends, including “surged,” “overtook,” “steady increase,” and “predictions,” and the meaning is generally clear. There are also attempts at more formal reporting language, such as “contributed” and “share holder.” However, some choices are imprecise or unnatural for this graph: countries do not “contribute” to population percentage, and “share holder” is not appropriate here. “Population” is also repeatedly used where “urban population” or “proportion living in cities” would be more accurate. In addition, “asian” and “philippines” need capital letters. Aim for consistent, precise terms such as “urbanisation rate” and “the proportion of the population living in cities,” and check spelling and collocations.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and more complex sentence forms, including clauses with “whereas” and “while,” and most of the message remains understandable. Some sentences, however, have grammatical or punctuation problems that reduce precision. For example, “Indonesia starting with the smallest share overtook thailand in 2000 at 28% … and was the second highest contributor” lacks clear clause boundaries and makes the subject of “was” uncertain. The forecast sentence beginning “Malaysia at just over 80%” is a fragment, and “Thailand still remains” uses an unnecessary combination of present forms. There are also inconsistent tense choices when describing past data and predictions. Use complete sentences, maintain past tense for historical figures and future forms for forecasts, and punctuate long comparisons more carefully.

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