Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-13

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The line graphs depict the information about that the percentage of the population living in cities from 1970 to 2040. From an overall analysis, it is vivdly manifested that the maximum individuals will be living in malaysia whereas the minimun figure can be observed in the case of thaliand. Turning into details, it is evident that, Tremendous increase can be witness in malaysia as it was noticed at 30% n 1970 year and it will be reach to 84%in 2040 year . on the contrery, indonesia and philippines followed plummetation by 11% and 31%. respectively, Probing further, it was interesting to note that the difference of 20% can be seen in the case of philippines during the peroid of 70 years. In 1970 year and 2040 year , thailand and philippines will be recorded at 40% and 50% compartively , look at first at malaysia , the figue stood at 30% in 1970 year , it then increase steadily, reaching 84% in 2040 year.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You identify the topic and include some relevant comparisons, such as Malaysia’s rise from about 30% to 84% and the Philippines’ change over the period. However, the response only minimally reports the graph’s main features, and several claims are inaccurate or unclear. In particular, saying Indonesia and the Philippines “followed plummetation” conflicts with the data: both rise overall, with Indonesia increasing substantially. The overview that Thailand has the lowest figure is true at the start, but not by 2040, when it remains below the other countries without being the only relevant feature. Include the contrasting trajectories: Malaysia becomes the most urbanised, Indonesia rises sharply, and the Philippines fluctuates. Use accurate comparisons across the period.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

There is an attempt to organise the response with an overview and detail paragraphs, using signposts such as “From an overall analysis,” “Turning into details,” and “Probing further.” This gives the reader some indication of the intended structure. However, the information is not arranged in a clear progression: the final section repeats Malaysia’s starting and ending figures, while comparisons among all four countries are incomplete. Several ideas are joined in long, confusing sequences, and punctuation and spacing make the relationships between claims difficult to follow. Group the overview separately, then organise details by meaningful trends or time periods. Use clear sentence boundaries and connect each comparison directly to the figures it describes.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt a range of vocabulary, including “overall analysis,” “Tremendous increase,” and “steadily,” and the topic is generally recognisable. However, word choice, spelling, and collocation errors are frequent enough to make some statements difficult to understand. Examples include “vivdly manifested,” “plummetation,” “contrery,” and “compartively”; some expressions, such as “maximum individuals,” are also unsuitable for describing percentages. Prefer precise, familiar language for data reporting rather than ornate phrases. Check spelling carefully and use standard collocations such as “the proportion of the population,” “rose to,” “fell slightly,” and “compared with.” This would make your descriptions clearer and more natural.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple statements and longer sentences, but control is inconsistent, particularly when describing past and projected figures. For example, “it will be reach” has an incorrect verb form, while “it then increase steadily” lacks the appropriate past-tense ending. The opening phrase “the information about that” is also structurally faulty, and several sentences run together without clear punctuation. These errors sometimes make the intended meaning hard to follow. Practise forming accurate comparisons with consistent tense: use past forms for 1970–2020 and future or prediction language for 2030–2040. Build shorter, complete sentences first, then add subordinate clauses only when their grammar is secure.

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