Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-13

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

 

Student answer (Band 4.0)

The line graph illustrate information about the percentages of the polution in four countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020,with predict from 2030 to 2040 .The time period of 30 years.overall,the percentages of the population indonasia and malaysia icreasing the population while,phillippines little bit increasing but thailand increasing much with malaysia .

In 1970,the percentages of population Indonasia and Malaysia is very highly increasing from 1970 to 2040 .

solowly slowly go up in the era oof 2000 which is good from other countries .

In 1970,the percentages of population of phillippines 1970

is 30% while 1980 to 2000go high on 40% the population of this country is going up in the era of 1990.

In1970, the percentages of the population of Thailand is going down in the era of 1970 while in 1990 some going up like 5% in 2040 is going up and it is 45%of the population.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.0

The response identifies the general topic and attempts to describe all four countries, but it does not provide a clear, accurate overview of the main trends. For example, it says Indonesia and Malaysia were “very highly increasing” from 1970 to 2040, without reporting their contrasting paths: Malaysia rises steadily to the highest level, while Indonesia grows especially strongly after 1990. The Philippines is described as reaching about 40% by 2000, although it peaks around 1990 and then falls before rising again. Thailand did not decline in 1970; its urban share generally increased. The response also contains only 143 words, below the required 150. Select the key comparisons and support them with accurate figures and a concise overview.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 3.5

There is some attempt to organise the response, including an opening overview and separate paragraphs about the Philippines and Thailand. However, the progression is difficult to follow because the first body paragraph makes unclear claims about Indonesia and Malaysia, and the next paragraphs do not consistently present the countries’ changes in chronological order. Linking is limited and sometimes confusing, as in “while, phillippines little bit increasing but thailand increasing much with malaysia.” Repeated openings such as “In 1970, the percentages of population…” also make the report feel repetitive rather than logically connected. Use a clear overview followed by two comparison-based paragraphs, grouping countries with similar or contrasting trends and using time markers to guide the reader.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The response uses some relevant vocabulary for describing a graph, including “percentages,” “population,” “increasing,” and “going up,” so the topic is generally recognisable. However, the range is narrow and several expressions are imprecise or unnatural, such as “very highly increasing,” “little bit increasing,” and “going down in the era of 1970.” Spelling errors—including “polution,” “indonasia,” “phillippines,” and “icreasing”—also reduce clarity and control. Aim for accurate trend language and collocations, such as “the proportion rose steadily,” “reached a peak,” and “declined slightly.” Check country names and spelling carefully, and avoid repeating “going up” when more precise alternatives are available.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.0

The response attempts to form sentences about changes over time, but grammatical control is limited and errors frequently make relationships between ideas unclear. For instance, “The line graph illustrate” has subject–verb disagreement, while “the percentages of population Indonasia and Malaysia is” has problems with agreement and sentence construction. Tense and verb forms are also inconsistent in “Thailand is going down” and “some going up.” Several sentences lack clear boundaries or punctuation, including the opening sentence, which runs together multiple ideas. Practise building accurate simple sentences first, then combine them with controlled clauses using “while” or “whereas.” Check subject–verb agreement, articles, past-tense forms for historical data, and punctuation between sentences.

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