Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-14

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

 

Student answer (Band 6.0)

A line graph illustrates data of the people who lived in cities from1970 to 2020 of four different countries: Philippines, Malaysia, Thailand and Indonesia in percentage. Additionally, it predicts population for 2030 and 2040 of the above mentioned countries.

Overall, Malaysia's percentage is higher than others and will also be more than others in future. Similarly, Indonesia also follows the upward trend from the beginning to end.

To begin with, in 1970 city's population was around 14%, 19%, 30% and 31% for Indonesia, Thailand, Malaysia and Philippines, respectively and it kept growing in all countries till 1990. Philippines faced a slight decline over two decades was around 40% in 2010. However, it increased after that and will keep on rising and will be about 53% in 2040. Furthermore, Indonesia and Malaysia's population grew significantly in cities throghout the period and will be approximately 62% and 82% in 2040, in sequence. Whereas Thailand's cities saw a steady increase in population till 2020 and was around 31% and will be around 48% in 2040.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You identify the main overall pattern: Malaysia finishes highest and Indonesia rises substantially, and you include all four countries with relevant start- and end-period figures. The account of the Philippines also captures its rise, dip and later recovery. However, some details are inaccurate or unclear: the 1970 figures are given as 14%, 19%, 30% and 31%, whereas the chart is approximately 14%, 18%, 30% and 32%; more importantly, the Philippines is described as around 40% in 2010, rather than about 42.5%. The overview could also compare the countries more fully, especially noting that Indonesia overtakes the Philippines around 2010 and that Malaysia’s growth is particularly strong. Some trends, such as Thailand’s modest early rise, are reported but not developed.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, a brief overview and a paragraph of supporting details. The sequence from the starting figures through later changes to the forecasts is generally easy to follow, and linking expressions such as “However,” “Furthermore” and “Whereas” help signal relationships. This coherent organisation is a strength. To make progression more consistently clear, group the figures into more direct comparisons rather than moving between countries within long sentences. For example, the sentence beginning “Furthermore, Indonesia and Malaysia’s population…” combines two different trends, while “Whereas Thailand’s cities…” is not smoothly connected to the preceding point. Clearer sentence boundaries and more precise references would make the cohesion less noticeable and more flexible.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of task-related vocabulary, including “slight decline,” “upward trend,” “grew significantly” and “steady increase.” These expressions communicate the main movements, and the reader can understand the comparisons. Some choices are imprecise or unnatural for describing a proportion: “population for 2030” is less accurate than referring to the projected urban share, and “city’s population” can suggest the number of residents rather than the percentage living in cities. There are also spelling and form errors, including “throghout” and “above mentioned.” Aim for more precise collocations such as “urban population share” and “is projected to reach,” and vary verbs for rises and falls without using them where the data do not support the claim.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex structures, including clauses introduced by “However” and “Whereas,” and most of the meaning remains understandable. Some grammatical errors nevertheless reduce accuracy. In “Philippines faced a slight decline over two decades was around 40% in 2010,” the clauses are joined without a clear grammatical link; use a full stop or a relative clause. “Thailand’s cities saw a steady increase … and was around 31%” has an unclear subject and faulty agreement, since the percentage—not the cities—was around that figure. The opening also needs a space in “from 1970,” and “it predicts population” has an unclear pronoun reference. Practise separating long sentences and checking subjects, verb forms and articles while retaining your attempts at complex structures.

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