Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-15

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

 

Student answer (Band 6.5)

This line graph illustrates the trends of urban population in four countries of Asia between 1970 and 2020, along with the expectations for 2030 and 2040.

Overall, urbanisation in every Asian state has increased over the peiod, and projected to rise in future as well. Moreover, in 1970, the highest number of men and women were reported in Philipines. Whereas, the population of Malaysia rose sharply surpassing Philippines in 1990.

To begin with, Philipines and Thailand showed similar trends. Both rose gradually, and are estimated to rise in future. In Philipines, 31% of the total population were living in cities in 1970. It remained same for next 10 years before rising to its peak at almost 50% in 1990. After it declined to around 40% in 2010. However, it started rising again, and is projected to show similar trend in future. On the other hand, Thailand rose at lower rate i.e. from approximately 19% in 1970 to nearly 28% in 2020,and expected to surge at almost 40 % by 2040.

Further analyzing the data, it is clear that Malaysia and Indonesia soared in urbanisation. There urban population was around 13% (Indonesia) and 30% (Malaysia) in 1970. Their urban population reached at 50% (indonesia) and around 70% (Malaysia) in 2020. They are expected to rise in 2030 and 2040 by following the similar trend.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You identify the overall rise in urbanisation and make relevant comparisons, including Malaysia overtaking the Philippines and Indonesia’s strong growth. The main trends are generally recognisable, but some details are inaccurate or insufficiently developed. For example, the Philippines did not remain at roughly 31% through 1980: it rose from about 32% to 34%, then reached around 48% in 1990. Thailand’s figure in 2020 is about 34%, not 28%, and its projected 2040 level is close to 50%, rather than 40%. The overview also says the Philippines had the highest figure in 1970, although Malaysia was slightly lower and the Philippines was indeed highest. Include clearer endpoint comparisons and more accurate figures to make the summary more complete.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs grouping the Philippines with Thailand and Malaysia with Indonesia. This grouping helps the reader follow the comparisons, and transitions such as “To begin with” and “Further analyzing the data” signal progression. The organisation is coherent, though some links between ideas are mechanical or unclear. For instance, “Whereas” begins a sentence fragment after the overview, and “After it declined” has an unclear reference. The final paragraph says the countries are expected to rise “by following the similar trend,” but does not specify how their future paths compare. Use complete linked sentences and clearer references, and connect each paragraph’s comparisons more explicitly.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.5

You use a suitable range of task-related vocabulary, including “urbanisation,” “surpassing,” “gradually,” “projected,” and “soared,” which allows you to describe trends and comparisons. Some less common choices are not fully natural or precise: “the highest number of men and women were reported” does not fit a percentage of the population, while “rose at lower rate” and “reached at 50%” are awkward collocations. There are also spelling and word-form slips, such as “peiod,” “Philipines,” and “There” where “Their” is intended. These do not prevent understanding, but more accurate collocations and careful proofreading would make the description more fluent and precise.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and more complex forms, including “Although”/contrast structures and clauses such as “which is projected to rise,” and the main message remains understandable. Some grammatical errors persist. In “urbanisation in every Asian state has increased over the peiod, and projected to rise,” the second verb needs a subject and auxiliary (“is projected”). “Both rose gradually, and are estimated to rise” shifts tense awkwardly, while “It remained same” needs an article, and “population were living” has a subject–verb agreement problem. The sentence beginning “Whereas” is also incomplete. Review verb forms, agreement, articles, and sentence boundaries; greater control of these patterns would make your varied structures more consistently accurate.

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