Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-16

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The graph compares the percentage of the population living in Phillippines, Malaysia, Thailand, and Indonesia in 1970 and 2020.

Overall, the population of all four cities increased substantially over the period, while the predictions are also expected to peak in between 2030 and 2040.

First of all, the percentage of the total population of Malaysia and Phillipines were almost same, at 30 and 32% respectively, although the population of Malaysia rose up to 40-45% in 1980, reaching around 60%-75% in 2000 and 2020, meanwhile the population of Phillipines increased subsequentally to 30-50% in 1970 and 1990, which rose further to 60-75% in 2000 and 2020. Furthermore, the percentage of Thailand's population were 20%-29% in 1970 and 1990, and than remained fluctuated in between 28-30% in 2000 and 2020, although Indonesia witnessed a sharp increase, starting from 13% in 1970, rising to 25% in 2000, reaching around 50% in 2020.

Secondly, the population of all four cities are expected to rise in 2030 and 2040, expecting almost 7-10% increase in every city.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the four countries and include an overview that all figures rise, but the overview is not fully accurate: the chart shows Malaysia and the Philippines declining or fluctuating at points, and the forecasts do not show all countries peaking between 2030 and 2040. Several comparisons and figures are also misreported. For example, the Philippines reaches about 48% in 1990 and then falls before rising again, rather than increasing to 60–75% by 2000 and 2020. Thailand is broadly stable only after 2000, while Indonesia rises sharply from 14% to 52% by 2020. The forecast paragraph is relevant but too general; report the countries’ different projected levels, especially Malaysia’s lead and Thailand’s lower figure.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, an overview, and two body sections, with sequencing phrases such as “First of all” and “Secondly.” This gives the reader a basic route through the information. However, the first body paragraph combines several countries and long comparisons in a way that makes the progression difficult to follow, and some references are unclear—for example, “which rose further” does not clearly identify the figure or country being discussed. The overview also does not prepare the reader for the detailed comparisons that follow. Group the historical trends more clearly, then give the forecasts in a separate, specific paragraph, using comparisons such as “whereas” and “by contrast” to show relationships.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some task-relevant vocabulary, including “percentage,” “rose,” “sharp increase,” and “expected to rise,” so the main trends are generally understandable. There is also an attempt to vary expressions rather than repeat one verb throughout. However, several choices are inaccurate or unnatural, such as “population of all four cities” when the graph concerns the share of people living in cities, and “peak” for values that are simply projected to rise. “Increased subsequentally” is both an incorrect form and an unsuitable choice in context, while “remained fluctuated” is not a natural collocation. Spelling errors in “Phillippines” and “Phillipines” also reduce control. Aim for precise trend language such as “urban population share,” “rose steadily,” and “levelled off.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mixture of simple statements and longer sentences with clauses, including “although” and “while,” which shows some range. The main message is usually recoverable, but errors in agreement and verb forms occur in several places. For example, “the percentage … were” should use a singular verb, and “the population of all four cities are expected” has the same agreement problem. The construction “remained fluctuated” is also grammatically faulty; use “fluctuated” or “remained relatively stable.” Some long sentences join multiple comparisons, making punctuation and clause relationships harder to control. Build accuracy by separating country comparisons into shorter sentences and checking subject–verb agreement and consistent past-tense reporting.

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