Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-18

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

 

Student answer (Band 5.5)

According to the graph population is increasing in all the given asian countries from the start of 1970 to till 2040. Some changes have shown in middle of the period that will be discussed later on.

Overall, In Malaysia cities population increase very rapidly as compared to remaining three. Indonasian cities also takes part in it and stand at scond. Philippines were get fast in the middle but got controll on cities population in comming years. Same is the case with thiland whose cities population increased in early period but he stop such fast increase.

Furthermore, Malaysia is at the top in population with respect to remaining asian countries. In 1970 its cities were less populated than Philippines cities but with the passage of time its cities full with people and in future its cities represent the 80% of his total population. While in Philippines cities 30% of the total population lived in 1970. This percentage increase gradually. Same is the case with thiland whose cities represent less than 20% of total population but as the time pass through this percentage increase. Indonasia is very different from the others because its cities represented lowest population with respect to other but a drastic seen to view that now and future its cities represnt half of its total population

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You identify the broad upward trend in all four countries and give a useful overview of Malaysia’s rapid growth and Indonesia’s rise. Several comparisons are relevant: Malaysia began below the Philippines, while its urban share is projected to reach over 80%, and Thailand starts below 20%. However, some key features are unclear or inaccurate. The Philippines did not simply “get fast in the middle”: it peaked around 1990, declined to 2010, then rose again. Thailand’s increase also continues rather than stopping, and Indonesia overtakes the Philippines by 2010 and becomes second, a comparison worth stating explicitly. The response addresses the task, but some trends and comparisons are less fully developed than others.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, an overview, and further details, so the reader can follow its general purpose. However, progression within paragraphs is uneven, and some linking phrases are repetitive or do not clarify the relationship between ideas. For example, “Same is the case” is used for both Thailand and the Philippines, although their trends differ, while “Furthermore” introduces information that partly repeats the overview. The final sentence combines Indonesia’s low starting point with its later growth but does not clearly identify when the change occurs. Organise the body around clear comparisons or time periods, and use precise references such as “by 2010” and “in contrast” to make the progression easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some task-relevant vocabulary, including “percentage,” “rapidly,” “gradually,” and “drastic,” and you attempt to describe trends rather than merely list figures. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, which sometimes makes the meaning difficult to interpret. Phrases such as “cities full with people,” “stand at second,” and “a drastic seen to view” are not natural ways to describe the data. Country names and other words are also misspelled, including “Indonasia,” “thiland,” and “scond.” Build a more precise set of trend expressions—such as “urban population share,” “rose steadily,” “peaked,” and “was projected to”—and check spelling and collocation carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more extended sentences, including clauses linked with “while” and “because,” but control is inconsistent. Errors in verb forms and agreement appear in examples such as “Indonasian cities also takes part” and “Philippines were get fast”; the latter also makes the trend difficult to understand. Tense and sentence construction are problematic in “as the time pass through this percentage increase,” and articles or possessives are missing or misused in phrases such as “in middle of the period” and “his total population.” Capitalisation and punctuation are also inconsistent, particularly after “Overall.” Aim for shorter, complete sentences first, then add subordinate clauses while checking subject–verb agreement, articles, and consistent past and future forms.

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