Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-20

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

 

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The graph illustrates the information about the proportion of the people living in the cities between 1070 to 2020,with future guesses for 2030 and 2040.

Overall, Malaysia accounted for the highest share in increasing population in cities throughout the period and aslo predicted for the future, while Thailand experencied only small increasing rate and stands below 50% of total popuation.

Malaysia shares only 30% in total population in 1970 then showed steady increase to 1990, after 1990 it experienced a significant upward trend till 2020, it is predicted that its proportion will cross the 80% of population in 2040. While Philippines started from approximately 31% of total population and remained stable at that figure to 1980, then experienced a rapid downfall till 2010 at just above 40% of total population, there was only slow increase to 2020 and prediction shows general increase to 2040 at about 50%.Thailand,s population in 1970 was only 19%, during two decades to 1990 its ratio stands at 29%, 2000 Its population proportion remain steady by cut-off the Indonesia, there was no significant alter in its ratio to 2020, it is predicted its percentage will grow up in next two decades and cross the figure of 40%. Indonesia experienced a great alter in its population rate from 1970 to 2000 from 11% to 21% respectively, in 2000 it cross the Thailand at 29% and in 2010 it grew up rapidily by crossing Philippines also its ratio was continously shows increasing till 2020, its ratio will predicted at 50% in 2040.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You identify the main broad pattern: Malaysia rises to become the highest series, while Thailand remains below 50%, and you include all four countries and the forecast period. However, several details are inaccurate or unclear. Malaysia’s rise is described as “significant” only after 1990, but it had already increased from about 30% to 45.5% by then; the Philippines did not undergo a “rapid downfall” from 1990 to 2010, but declined gradually from about 48% to 42.5%. Indonesia’s figures are also substantially understated: it rose from about 14% to 30.5% between 1970 and 2000, not from 11% to 21%. The overview would be stronger if it highlighted Indonesia’s rapid growth and the Philippines’ fluctuation more accurately.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response has an opening, an overview and a body that attempts to compare the four countries, so there is some organisation. However, progression is difficult to follow because the final body paragraph combines Thailand and Indonesia in one long sequence, and the sentence beginning “2000 Its population proportion…” is especially hard to interpret. Linking words such as “then,” “while” and “after” are used, but connections are sometimes inaccurate or mechanical; for example, “While Philippines…” does not clearly connect to the preceding Malaysia information. Separate the country comparisons into clearer paragraphs, use complete sentences, and make each comparison explicit. This would give the reader a more reliable route through the trends.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some task-relevant vocabulary, including “proportion,” “upward trend,” “remained stable” and “predicted,” and the general subject is usually understandable. However, the range and control are limited by repeated or imprecise expressions such as “population ratio,” “great alter” and “cross the figure.” Several word forms and spellings also distract, including “experencied,” “popuation,” “rapidily” and “continously.” Some collocations are unnatural, for example “share in total population” and “population will grow up.” Choose precise trend language and check spelling and word forms; for instance, describe a percentage as “the urban share” and say it “is projected to rise,” rather than saying the population “will grow up.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

There are attempts at longer, complex sentences, but these are often faulty, and sentence boundaries are not consistently controlled. For example, “While Philippines started…” is a fragment-like construction, while the passage beginning “Thailand,s population…” runs several ideas together without clear punctuation. Tense and agreement are also unreliable: “its ratio stands” and “its ratio will predicted” do not fit the past and forecast time references. Articles and possessives are sometimes missing or misplaced, as in “the Philippines” and “Thailand,s.” These errors can make relationships between events difficult to understand. Use shorter, complete sentences first, then add subordinate clauses carefully, checking verb forms and punctuation.

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