Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-21

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The given lineer graph illustrate the information about the percentage of the population in the 4 Asian nations living in cities from 1970 to 2020 with prediction for 2030 and 2040 The data has been calibrated in percentage.

prima facie ,first and foremost point is that, malaysia stood at 30% in 1970 vis-a vis 40% in 1990. after that , Suddenly increase from 2000 to 2020 at 75%. It is at peak level in 2040. More over, Philippines population. Firstly, constant subsequently, their is a sudden incline then modest decline in 2020. After that similar.

Turning to the rest of information, Thailand and indonesia starting at 20% in 1970 then, modest increase in 1990 then remain constant from 2000 to 2020 rather than slightly upsurge.In the contrary side, Indonesia starting at 11 % in 19, 70 the population stood at 25% and 45% in 2000 and 2010 respectively. The population of city witnessed at 60% in 2040

overall, it is immedtely concern that , malaysia and indonesia follow upward trend whereas,philippines and thailand follow downward trend.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You identify several relevant movements, including Malaysia’s overall rise, the Philippines’ rise and subsequent dip, and Indonesia’s strong growth. However, the account is incomplete and contains important inaccuracies. Malaysia is described as reaching 75% by 2020, whereas the chart shows about 76% in 2020 and a further rise to roughly 84% by 2040; the peak is not clearly quantified. Thailand did not follow a downward trend: it rose gradually from about 18% to 34% by 2020, then more sharply. The overview incorrectly groups Thailand with the Philippines as declining. Some figures and periods are also confused, particularly Indonesia’s “25% and 45% in 2000 and 2010.” Select the main comparisons accurately and give a clear, chart-supported overview.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response has an opening, two body paragraphs and a concluding overview, and phrases such as “Turning to the rest of information” signal a change of focus. However, the progression is difficult to follow because several ideas are compressed or left incomplete: “More over, Philippines population” does not form a clear point, and “After that similar” does not explain what remained similar. The discussion also shifts between countries and years without consistently showing how the figures relate. Linking expressions such as “in the contrary side” are used inaccurately, while “first and foremost” and “prima facie” add little to the organisation. Group the countries by their trends, use clear time references, and make each paragraph develop a complete comparison.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt a range of vocabulary, including “modest decline,” “upward trend” and “stood at,” which are relevant to describing a graph. However, many choices are inaccurate, awkward or overly formal, and this sometimes makes the meaning unclear. Examples include “the data has been calibrated,” “at peak level,” and “the population of city witnessed at 60%.” “Suddenly increase” is also an unnatural collocation for a trend description. Spelling and word-form errors, such as “lineer” and “immedtely,” further reduce control. Prefer precise, conventional language for chart reporting, and check that each verb and collocation fits the subject and the trend being described.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

There are attempts to use longer structures, including “whereas” and “after that,” but sentence control is inconsistent and errors frequently make relationships between ideas hard to understand. The opening lacks a clear finite verb structure (“The given lineer graph illustrate”), and several fragments appear, such as “More over, Philippines population” and “After that similar.” Tense, agreement and article use also need attention: “Malaysia stood” is followed by “Suddenly increase,” while “Thailand and indonesia starting” lacks an auxiliary or finite verb. Punctuation and capitalisation are unreliable, with run-on phrasing and inconsistent commas. Build complete sentences first, then add subordinate clauses and connectors only when their grammatical relationship is clear.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.