Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-28

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

This chart inform about the ratio of the residents in four asian countries living in the cities from 1970 to 2020 with forecat for 2030 to 2040. Overall we will discuss the peridict the ratio of population.

Intially, i am going to disscuss the resident in Indonesia, From 1970 to 2010 the people increase slowly it stop in between 40 to 50%. In future it will go slow to. Whereas people lived in thailand was little less than 1970 and then it went up gradually, Outlook from 2020 to 2040 it will be same. Then we have Malaysia, 1970 to 2010 community went up very fast from 30 to 70 percent guesses said it will go more then 80%. lastly we have Philippines which were rise and fall in1970 to 2010 estimated in future it will rise and fall to.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You identify the four countries and make a few relevant comparisons, including Malaysia’s strong rise and the Philippines’ fluctuations. However, the response reports the graph only minimally and several key trends are inaccurate or unclear. For example, Indonesia rises substantially rather than “slowly” between 1970 and 2010, and its projected growth is not simply “slow”; Thailand is expected to increase notably by 2040, not remain the same. The overview is also unclear (“Overall we will discuss the peridict the ratio of population”) and does not summarise the main contrasts. The response is 10 words below the required minimum. To improve, give a clear overview and support it with accurate start/end figures and comparisons.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

There is some basic organisation: the response moves through Indonesia, Thailand, Malaysia and the Philippines, and words such as “Whereas,” “Then” and “lastly” signal transitions. However, the sequence does not create a clear overall progression, and the opening overview is difficult to understand. Several ideas are compressed into long, loosely connected sentences, such as the discussion of Indonesia and Thailand, while the country-by-country structure makes comparisons between the series hard to follow. Capitalisation and punctuation are also inconsistent, including “i” and the comma after “Indonesia.” Use separate paragraphs for an overview and grouped comparisons, and connect related trends with clear, accurate linking phrases.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

Your vocabulary is basic and repetitive, with repeated reliance on “went up,” “rise,” “people” and “ratio.” Some choices make the meaning difficult to interpret: “the resident in Indonesia,” “it stop in between 40 to 50%,” and “guesses said” do not describe the data naturally. There are also noticeable spelling errors, including “forecat,” “peridict,” “Intially” and “disscuss.” These limitations reduce precision when describing trends and projections. Build a small set of accurate graph terms, such as “the proportion of the population,” “increased steadily,” “fluctuated,” and “is projected to reach,” and check spelling before submitting.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response attempts some longer sentences and uses basic past and future forms, but grammatical control is inconsistent and the range remains limited. Errors include missing or incorrect articles and agreement in “This chart inform” and “the people increase,” as well as tense problems in “it stop” and “it will go slow to.” Sentence boundaries and punctuation are often faulty: “Intially, i am going to disscuss the resident in Indonesia, From 1970…” joins separate ideas with a comma, and capitalisation is inconsistent. These errors sometimes make the intended meaning unclear. Practise accurate simple sentences first, then combine them using clauses such as “while” and “whereas,” checking subject–verb agreement and past versus projected time.

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