Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-30

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

 

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The graph illustrate information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040.

Overall , It is noticeable that Malaysia have highier population rate 80 % in 2040 However,Thailand have lowest population rate 50% in 2040

On the Left side of graph show line of percentage from 0 to 90 . Lower line of the graph demonstrate years from 1970 to 2040 .Small box on the left side contain symbols line and countaries name. Philippines have lowest population of poppulation 30% in 1970 and highest percentage of population 50% in 2040. Malaysia have lowest population of poppulation 30% in 1970 and highest percentage of population 80% in 2040. Thailand have lowest population of poppulation 20% in 1970 and highest percentage of population 50% in 2040. Indonesia have lowest population of poppulation 15% in 1970 and highest percentage of population 60% in 2040

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You identify the topic and give a brief overview, noting that Malaysia is highest and Thailand lowest by 2040. However, the overview is incomplete: it misses the major change that Indonesia rises sharply and overtakes the Philippines, while Malaysia becomes the clear leader. Several figures are also inaccurate or too broadly rounded: for example, Malaysia reaches about 84%, not 80%, and Indonesia reaches about 64%, not 60%; the Philippines peaks at about 48% in 1990 rather than 50% in 2040. The body mostly lists starting and ending values, with little comparison of changes across the period. The response is 132 words, below the required 150, and therefore does not provide enough developed coverage of the graph.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

There is a basic paragraph structure, with an opening, an overview and a body paragraph, and the country-by-country sequence gives the reader some way to follow the information. However, progression is limited because the body repeats the same pattern—each country’s lowest and highest figures—rather than grouping or comparing the trends. The overview’s contrast between Malaysia and Thailand is useful, but it is not developed in the following paragraph. Linking is sparse, and punctuation around phrases such as “Overall , It is noticeable” interrupts the flow. To improve, organise the details around meaningful comparisons, such as Malaysia’s sustained rise versus the Philippines’ fluctuation, and Indonesia’s rapid growth.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The response uses some relevant task vocabulary, including “percentage,” “population,” “predictions,” and “graph,” so the general subject is understandable. However, the range is basic and repetitive, especially in the repeated phrase “lowest population of poppulation” and the frequent use of “population” where “urban share” or “proportion living in cities” would be more precise. Several spelling and word-form errors, including “highier,” “countaries,” and “poppulation,” reduce accuracy. Some expressions are also unnatural, such as “Lower line of the graph demonstrate years” and “population rate.” Aim to use accurate trend language—“rose,” “declined,” “levelled off,” and “overtook”—to describe changes rather than merely naming the graph’s parts.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt a few sentence forms, including an overview with “However” and longer sentences describing each country, but most structures are simple and repetitive. Frequent agreement and verb-form errors are evident: “The graph illustrate” should be “The graph illustrates,” “Malaysia have” should be “Malaysia has,” and “Lower line … demonstrate” needs “demonstrates.” Articles and sentence boundaries are also inconsistent, as in “On the Left side of graph show line,” which lacks a clear subject and article. Capitalisation and spacing around punctuation are uneven. These errors sometimes make the description awkward to read, although the main intended meaning can generally be recovered. Practise accurate subject–verb agreement and complete sentence patterns before adding more complex structures.

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